Many children are encouraged by their parents to get a part time job in their free time. What are the advantaged and disadvantages of children doing so

#children #parents #part #time #job

Education and

work

experience have a crucial role in academics.

While

some parents encourage their

children

to seek

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

during their spare

time

, others are against

this

notion

due to

their detrimental effects on

children

health

This

essay will delve deeper into

advantages

Correct article usage

the advantages

show examples

and disadvantages offered by

such

inclination

Correct article usage

an inclination

show examples

. On the one hand,

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

can potentially improve future prospects of

work

. To elaborate on

this

, since many

free

Add a hyphen

free-time

show examples

time

jobs

provide

Remove the article

apply

show examples

insight into professional life situations, they enable

students

to hone new skills and foster ideas that can be harnessed in their future

jobs

For example

, in order to provide practical field exposure, several schools globally offer more free

time

students

and encourage them to opt

part

time

Correct your spelling

part-time

show examples

employment in

interim

Correct article usage

the interim

show examples

Thus

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

prepare

children

for their professional life by broadening their horizons of learning.

On the other hand

, it is believed that

students

who

work

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

cannot maintain a healthy lifestyle.

In other words

, when youngsters' daily schedules comprise merely

work

and school, their routine unable them to participate in any physical activity.

For instance

, numerous studies have reported the demerits of

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

employment on

students

' physical

health

Such

sedentary lifestyles make

children

more prone to diseases

such

as obesity.

Part

Add a hyphen

Part-time

show examples

time

jobs

therefore

, rob

children

of their physical activities and adversely

effects

Correct your spelling

affects

show examples

their

health

. In conclusion,

although

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

part

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

time

jobs

offer invaluable

work

experience and

emboldens

Change the verb form

embolden

show examples

students

for various employments, it can detrimentally impact

children

health

by not sparing them any free

time

Submitted by hadia.iftikhar126 on Fri Aug 23 2024

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task achievement

To further improve the task response, consider expanding on the examples provided. This will make your arguments more compelling and clear.

coherence

Ensure that sentences are crafted carefully to avoid minor grammatical errors which can slightly detract from the essay's overall clarity and coherence.

introduction conclusion

When concluding, avoid abrupt endings. Summarize the main points effectively and provide a final thought or viewpoint.

introduction conclusion

The introduction clearly sets the context and outlines the essay’s main points effectively. This provides a strong framework for the rest of the essay.

logical structure

The essay maintains a logical structure with clear paragraphs, making it easy to follow the arguments presented.

supported main points

There is a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, demonstrating an ability to see multiple perspectives.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

responsibility
punctuality
work ethic
financial literacy
budgeting
time management
work experience
career prospects
independence
self-esteem
communication
interpersonal skills
academic responsibilities
school performance
hobbies
relaxation
well-being
stress
fatigue
premature adulthood
childhood experiences

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Many children are encouraged by their parents to get a part time job in their free time. What are the advantaged and disadvantages of children doing so

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that the priority of the government should be to ensure a growing economy. While others believe that the government should focus its efforts on uplifting the less fortunate? Discuss both views.

Some people think that in order to be successful in business one has to study at university, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Traffic congestion is a worldwide problem for urban populations. What are some of the causes of this problem and what measures can be taken to address it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.