The chart below shows the result of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the result of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart illustrates the proportion of habits of city residents for purchasing
coffee
, Tea and drinks in five different Australian cities in the
last
four weeks.
Overall
, it can be seen that most of the
people
in all cities went to cafes to buy tea or
coffee
while
,
on the other hand
,
little
Correct word choice
fewer
show examples
people
went to buy fresh
coffee
in all five cities. Looking into detail,
people
in Sydney bought more than 60% of instant
coffee
whereas
more than 45% of
people
bought instant
coffee
.
Moreover
, the
people
of Sydney consumed 43
coffee
or tea.
In addition
, the point worth noting is that the same habit happened in Melbourne. In all the five countries less than 45% of
people
bought fresh
coffee
in the
last
4 weeks.
Moreover
, most noticeably of all it can be seen that, in Adelaide,
people
tend to buy instant
coffee
instead
of fresh
coffee
.
Submitted by sajeehulzamans on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last, moreover".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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