You have recently moved to a new neighbourhood and would like to join a sports centre there. You have found a private sports club. Write a letter to the manager of the sports club. In your letter, introduce yourself say why are you interested in this sports club ask some questions about the club e.g facilities, membership, costs etc. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

#neighbourhood #sports #centre #club #manager #questions #e #g #facilities #membership #costs #sir #madam

Dear Sir or Madam, I, Nakul Nair, recently moved to the Houston Heights area and am writing

this

letter to request details on your sports

club

, Vincent Social. To give you a little background on me, I currently work as a VP at an investment bank and my interests include reading, golf, tennis, and skiing.

Additionally

, I volunteer at a local animal shelter every other weekend. I found out about your

club

through one of my colleagues who spoke very highly of your

club

. He mentioned that you have a well-maintained tennis court which

peaked

Correct the spelling

piqued

show examples

my interest.

Therefore

, I would love to know more about your

club

. Specifically, I want details on the membership plans and costs, various facilities at the

club

, and dining options. I would

also

like a tour of the

club

as soon as possible. Please let me know if next weekend works for

this

. Please call me on my cell at +1 123-456-7890 anytime today if you want to

discuss

Correct pronoun usage

discuss this

show examples

. Yours sincerely, Nakul

Submitted by nakuleshj1998 on Sat Aug 24 2024

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task achievement

While your writing is structured well, there is one minor point to consider. You mentioned your volunteer work, but it seems not directly relevant to the purpose of your letter. It might be more effective to keep the introduction brief and focused on your interest in sports and physical activities relevant to the club's offerings.

task achievement

Be mindful of small grammatical details. You wrote 'peaked' instead of 'piqued'. Ensuring that such small errors are corrected can make your writing even more polished.

coherence cohesion

Your letter has a clear and logical structure, making it easy to follow.

coherence cohesion

Your use of paragraphs and transitions is effective, with each paragraph addressing a single idea.

task achievement

You have a very polite and formal tone, which is appropriate for this type of letter.

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Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

167 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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