The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend. Write at least 250 words.
Child obesity is a challenging dilemma in the modern world, especially in Western society, where the proportion of obese
children
has grown by almost 20% in the last
decade. This
essay will elaborate on several main culprits of this
issue and propose some outcomes of this
problem.
There are various factors leading to the rise in the number of obese children
. First of all, the diet of children
is mostly ignored by their parents. This
is due to
the
ignorance about the essential nutrients that are needed for the growth of Correct article usage
apply
children
and the harmful effects of unhealthy foods on their kids. Therefore
, unhealthy meals, such
as ready-made meals, which are a quick and easy option for many parents, are usually fed to children
, leading to detrimental substances entering the body. Another reason for the large number of obese children
is the numerous advertisements. For instance
, there are
a great Change the verb form
is
quantity
of Change the quantifier
number
colorful
advertisements about fast food brands like Pizza Hut or McDonald's appearing on every device, attracting Change the spelling
colourful
children
to eat fast food.
The effects of this
have been and will continue to be very serious. Firstly
, children
with obesity tend to have more health issues than normal children
, especially cancer. In addition
, cancer is a dangerous health problem, which may require the children
stay
in the hospital for an extended period. Not only that, overweight Fix the infinitive
to stay
children
often experience bullying from other kids because of the difference in body size. For example
, according to
a survey in 2022, among 100 students in a high school, more than 30% of them have discriminated against obese people. This
can damage obese children
's mental health and make them feel unconfident whenever they go out.
In conclusion, it is evident that there are several causes of this
obesity among Correct determiner usage
apply
children
and a variety of negative effects. Society must propose methods to address this
issue.Submitted by khoianh2404 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a comprehensive response to the prompt, addressing both causes and effects. However, consider providing more varied and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could discuss specific studies or data points related to childhood obesity.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized and coherent, adding more transitional phrases could improve the flow of your arguments. For example, phrases like 'in addition,' 'furthermore,' and 'on the other hand' can make your points clearer and more connected.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are strong and effectively frame the essay. They set the stage well for your discussion and summarize your key points succinctly.
task achievement
You clearly outline the causes and effects of childhood obesity, showing a good understanding of the issue. This makes your essay informative and relevant to the topic.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...
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