IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

.Your manager is going ot leave your company next month. You and a colleague want to give your manager a leaving present. Write a letter ot this colleague. nI your letter say how you feel about your manager leaving describe a possible present for your manager suggest arrangements for buying the present

#manager #ot #company #month #colleague #ni #arrangements
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I hope
this
Linking Words
 message finds you well. I wanted to take a moment to express how I feel about our manager leaving next month. It’s certainly bittersweet;
while
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 I'm excited
for
Change the preposition
about
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 their new opportunities, it feels like we’re losing an invaluable leader who has guided us through many challenges and successes. To show our appreciation for everything they’ve done, I think a personalized gift would be fitting. Perhaps we could consider getting them a high-quality leather notebook engraved with their initials?
This
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 way, they can carry memories of our time together
as well as
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 have something practical for future
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
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. As for the arrangements regarding purchasing the present, maybe we could pool some funds from other team members too? We should set up a quick meeting or send out an email to gauge interest in contributing by early next week so that we can finalize details before their
last
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 day. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
Submitted by henikeassociates on

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task response
For a higher score, consider expanding on specific memories or achievements of the manager to give a more personalized touch to your letter.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your transitions between paragraphs are seamless to enhance the overall flow of the letter.
task response
The letter addresses all parts of the task effectively, covering the emotional response, possible gift, and arrangements for purchasing the present.
task response
The letter maintains a formal and polite tone suitable for addressing a colleague about a professional matter.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph focuses on a single idea, making it easy for the reader to follow.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing of the letter are appropriate and contribute to a harmonious structure.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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