People have different job expectations for jobs. Some people prefer to do the same job for the same company, whereas others prefer to change jobs frequently. Write about the advantages and disadvantages of each viewpoint? Q
In the modern
workplace
, employees have different visions for careers some have a passion to shift
their jobs because of earning experiences and Change preposition
for shifting
change
moods, Wrong verb form
changing
While
While
others prefer not to secure their position at Correct word choice
apply
work
and get promotion
. Add an article
a promotion
the promotion
Therefore
, I will write the
cons and pros of different Change preposition
about the
job
expectations for
both perspectives.
On Change preposition
from
one
hand, individuals who would like to keep their Correct article usage
the one
job
because wild-range of reasons. First of all, having one
suitable career provides people good life
through earn
Change the verb form
earning
work
promotion
. Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
Thus
, they can have a great life
for themself as well as
their
next generation via rewards from Change the word
the
company
. Add an article
the company
Moreover
, workers would handle their position at work
throughout
hard- Change preposition
through
working
and loyalty toward Replace the word
work
workplace
. Add an article
the workplace
However
, the people who not
Add a missing verb
do not
change
their job
unable
to acquire new knowledge and experience. To elaborate more, some working Add a missing verb
are unable
environment
present Fix the agreement mistake
environments
same
routine Correct article usage
the same
everyday
yet the individual has just Replace the word
every day
one
professional side. According to
that, if the company replace Correct article usage
a parson’s
parson’s
position Correct your spelling
person’s
to
another area, she/ he will Change preposition
in
fell
because Verb problem
fail
the
lack Change preposition
of the
experience
.
Change preposition
of experience
Whereas
, on the other hand
, people who quickly shift to another work
area have multifaceted positive and negative. To begin
with pros, they will able
to acquire Add a missing verb
be able
diversity
Replace the word
diverse
job
opportunities, experiences ,and knowledge about market
. BecauseAdd an article
the market
,
they Remove the comma
apply
change
their career, they could find new workplace
which ameliorate their skills. Fix the agreement mistake
workplaces
In addition
, some workers love to try something new due to
feeling bored . So, their fluctuated
mood leads to Replace the word
fluctuating
disadvantage
point to replace the Correct article usage
a disadvantage
workplace
. One
main con is changing apartment
living area ( where the person Correct article usage
the apartment
live
) which makes workers’ Change the verb form
lives
family
feel unstable at home.
Fix the agreement mistake
families
Overall
, everyone should think twice before change
their Change the verb form
changing
job
to another one
. Having deep thinking on advantages
and disadvantages of each Correct article usage
the advantages
life
stages
will enhance our Fix the agreement mistake
stage
life
positively.Submitted by sheikha1996mohammed on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a decent structure. However, the body paragraphs need more logical progression and elaboration of points. Make sure each paragraph focuses on one main idea and fully explores it before moving on to the next.
task achievement
Some ideas are clear, but they lack depth. Make sure to elaborate on your points with specific examples or detailed explanations. This will make your arguments more convincing and your essay more comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
There are grammatical errors and awkward phrases throughout your essay. For example, "get promotion" should be "get a promotion" and "feel because the lack" should be "fail because of the lack." Writing more clearly and accurately will help your overall score.
task achievement
To improve the clarity of your ideas, make sure to fully explain and support each point. This will help you achieve a more complete response to the essay question. For example, when mentioning the pros and cons of frequently changing jobs, provide specific scenarios or data to support your claims.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both viewpoints and provides a reasonable amount of discussion on each side. This shows a balanced consideration of the topic, which is good for your task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
You have a good basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps to organize your ideas clearly.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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