The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activites at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

#information #numbers #participants #activites #centre #melbourne #australia #period #summarise #features #comparisons

The graph illustrates the

number

people

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

joined film clubs, martial arts,

amateur

dramatics

, table tennis, and musical

performances

at one social centre in Melbourne between 2000 and 2020, with the data measured in numbers.

Overall

, it is evident that the most popular activity was film clubs throughout the period,

while

amateur

and musical

performances

were the most uncommon. In terms of the highest

number

, the film club stood at 65 in 2005.

This

number

decreased slightly to 60 in 2010 before bouncing back to around 66 in 2020.

Moreover

, in the second position, martial arts started at 35 in 2000. It

also

had an unstable trend and did not change

at the end

. Meanwhile, table tennis began at 15 in 2000, and successfully overtook martial arts,

this

activity witnessed a significant growth to 55 in 2020. Regarding the remaining activities, there were 25

people

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

joined

amateur

dramatics

in 2000.

This

number

was followed by musical

performances

at 0

people

in 2000.

However

, both activities experienced a different trend, the interest in

amateur

dramatics

fell moderately to 15

people

and it was overtaken by musical

performances

at 17

people

in 2015.

Lastly

Amateur

dramatics

and musical

performances

ended at 8 and 19, respectively.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Sun Aug 25 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words number, people, amateur, dramatics, performances with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

205 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaivour to children?
There is an argument about the necessity of punishing the kids to learn the comparison between right and wrong at their first age. More or less, I agree with this issue but maybe it really depends on the situation. In other words, the intensity of punishing is crucial.
7
band
Discuss how the roles of the Knight and the Bishop in a game of chess can be seen as a metaphor for the relationship between men and women in society. Use examples from the text to support your argument.
In the modern context, the interaction and roles of genders, particularly how men and women relate, are constantly debated subjects. There are varying opinions; some advocate for complete equality in every respect, while others suggest that each gender possesses distinct roles that are mutually beneficial. The key point to understand is that men and women are interdependent, and competition over superiority is unproductive. Cooperation is the ideal approach, much like the synergistic roles of the Knight and Bishop in chess.
7.5
band
in some coutries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. to what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In this contemporary era, health problems and illnesses have been escalating in our society. Our nation's community has been suffering from various health-related difficulties due to the fact of consuming convenience cuisine items. Thus, some nations are of the opinion that authorities should impose a high rate of tax on ready-made meals. I completely agree with this opinion and the reasons are mentioned further.
4.5
band
Some university students wan to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for qualification.
Nowadays, some people who study in some universities learn some subjects in addition to their main subjects in their free time. However, others believe that both spending time and giving attention to studying for a qualification.
<4
band
In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In most of the countries, children qre becoming obese and unhealthy. However, some people believe that the government has the responsibility to solve this issue. I disagree with this statement because it is each individual's responsibility to be fit and healthy and their food choices.

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activites at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Discuss how the roles of the Knight and the Bishop in a game of chess can be seen as a metaphor for the relationship between men and women in society. Use examples from the text to support your argument.

in some coutries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. to what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some university students wan to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for qualification.

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?