The most important aim of science should be to improve peoples lives

In
this
contemporary epoch,
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of
science
is widely debated.
Science
plays an intrinsic role not only in an individual’s life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
helps in uplifting the communities.
Although
many people think that the goal of
science
is to augment the masses' lives, many believe that it is nonsensical. I am of the view that the ultimate aim of
science
is to eradicate conundrums from an individual’s life;
therefore
, modern
science
is keen to improve human healthcare systems and prevent environmental crises.
To begin
with,
science
has made numerous technological advancements, which
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
helped humans, over decades. Dealing with health issues has been one the the major concerns.
However
,
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
technological breakthroughs
it has
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
alleviated healthcare issues
such
as prevention against viruses and
Correct article usage
the detecting
show examples
detecting
Replace the word
detection
show examples
fractures
Change preposition
of fractures
show examples
through vaccines and machines, respectively.
According to
international media,
pervasiveness
Add an article
the pervasiveness
show examples
of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
virus,
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
, was controlled in just 3 years because of the fastidious nature of nature.
Moreover
,many people think that
this
virus could have demolished a huge population if it
was
Wrong verb form
had been
show examples
treated through conventional methods.
Hence
, much has been done by
science
to protect human society against numerous outbreaks, and more new discoveries are being made to prevent future pandemics.
Similarly
,
science
has been focusing on environmental degradation.Many new techniques are formed to protect the environment, as it constitutes a major role in
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
health.
Furthermore
, deleterious effects caused by pollution
such
as global warming and habitat loss
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
being restricted using green technologies, which is another scientific evolution.
Additionally
, scientists have found various alternatives to restore the endangered species through
advance
Wrong verb form
advanced
show examples
scientific discovery- gene cloning.
This
not only helps in restoring animal species
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
augments the defective human gene by replacing it with
non-
Correct article usage
a non-
show examples
detective gene, which aids in human health.
Therefore
,
science
is a widespread field
having
Wrong verb form
that has
show examples
many advantages that have proved to be good for human beings.
To conclude
, anticipating the role of
science
in life is integral to
overcome
Wrong verb form
overcoming
show examples
problems encountered.
Moreover
, the contribution of
science
is expansive because it has saved a plethora of lives, and has protected people from fatal diseases.
Submitted by uroojzulqernain on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

general
Your essay is generally well-structured, but there are some grammatical errors and issues with clarity in a few sentences. Work on sentence structure to ensure clarity and correctness.
task achievement
To strengthen your argument, you can present more balanced perspectives by acknowledging counterarguments and refuting them effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure seamless transitions between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt effectively with relevant examples such as the advancements in healthcare and gene cloning.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present and provide a clear framework for the essay.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported with specific examples and detailed explanations.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advancements
  • Cures for diseases
  • Quality of life
  • Environmental issues
  • Pollution
  • Sustainable resource management
  • Technological innovation
  • Efficient
  • Basic needs
  • Enhancing communication
  • Scientific discoveries
  • Informed decisions
  • Economic growth
  • Research and development
  • Job opportunities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: