Studies suggest that many teenagers these days prefer socialising online to meeting one another in person. Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Nowadays, it is common for young
people
to meet each other via video call and have an online meeting rather than see each other in real life. There are many reasons to prefer online meetings to an in-person meeting, one of them, some teenagers do not have the ability to go out at any
time
they want and do not have a car plus they can not drive, and some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parents reject in-person meeting because they think it is un safety,
for example
when I was 16 my mother rejected to meeting my friend because she thinks it will be dangers to me going by myself, but when I tell her we going to young
people
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
she accept, in
this
case calling your best friend via phone or zoom meeting is a good choice. To make in-person meetings easier and safer for young
people
we can take some steps.
Firstly
, specific places for them to have a good
time
like cafes or restaurants.
Secondly
, an effort in some activity they really enjoy,
for instance
; playing DJ or doing yoga or watching a movie, makes sense for them.
To sum up
, an in-person meeting is more enjoyable than online meetings, but it is common now because some young
people
can not hang out any
time
because of their parents or they do not have a transition, but we can change
this
by making a community for them, and make some special activity to have a good
time
, in
this
case, we give the teenagers chance to make memorize to remember
this
time
forever.
Submitted by reem.b.albalawi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay covers the topic but needs more depth in addressing the reasons why teenagers prefer online socialising and the measures to encourage face-to-face interactions. Consider explaining more reasons like ease of access to technology, social media influence, and peer pressure.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally clear but could be more comprehensive. Expand on your points with more detailed explanations and use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas effectively.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to improve clarity. For instance, 'un safety' should be 'unsafe' and 'make memorize' should be 'make memories'.
coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from a clearer structure. Ensure each paragraph has one main idea and use linking words to make the transitions between ideas smoother. For example, use 'Moreover,' or 'Additionally,' to connect different reasons or measures.
coherence cohesion
The introduction effectively sets the context, and the conclusion summarizes the main points. However, both parts could be improved by being more concise and focused. Aim to reinforce the main ideas discussed in the essay and provide a clear final thought.
task achievement
Your examples, such as the personal experience involving your mother, add a personal touch and are relevant to the discussion.
task achievement
The idea of creating specific places for teenagers to socialize safely is a practical and concrete suggestion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital platforms
  • primary means
  • social interaction
  • messaging apps
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • geographic barriers
  • perceived safety
  • control
  • online environments
  • global events
  • COVID-19 pandemic
  • accelerating
  • foster
  • community events
  • educational institutions
  • collaboration
  • guardians
  • pivotal role
  • participation
  • awareness
  • psychological benefits
  • physical benefits
  • in-person interactions
  • public campaigns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: