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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

When choosing the best candidate for a job, employers should consider personal qualities more than qualification and experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#candidate #job #employers #qualities #qualification
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Some people believe that companies hiring new employees should focus more on the personality of each
candidate
 rather than evaluating just their qualifications and experience. I believe that a hardworking and motivating
candidate
 could benefit certain businesses but a lot of fields need certified experts. On the one hand, a person who is excited to work can quickly learn new skills which can immensely benefit the company. By choosing an employee who has a positive mindset and is happy to do their
job
, the work gets done faster and a better environment is created for others. Hardworking, motivated, and career-oriented people inspire their colleagues to finish their tasks quickly. To illustrate, a business focusing on trash recycling called SIA "Getlini" often selects a few individuals who show a true passion for the profession and hires them for a certain period of time. If the
candidate
 truly is eager to learn and fits into the team dynamic, they have the opportunity to continue working there permanently.
On the other hand
, a variety of professions require the right experience and education.
For example
, hospitals looking to hire new experts in the medical field do not care about the personal qualities of a doctor, if the person is excellent at their
job
. These employees need to be highly skilled and fully capable of doing highly technical tasks. A
candidate
 who has a positive attitude and can communicate well with patients will never be chosen over someone who has a degree in medicine. In conclusion,
although
 there are professions which allow the employer to consider the personal qualities of an applicant, the majority of workspaces need someone who is trained to do their
job
 and has acquired experience over time. In my view, personality should come second when selecting a
candidate
 since their main task is to do well at their
job
.
Submitted by evijavidemane on

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task achievement
While your essay addresses the task well, providing specific examples for both sides of the argument, there is room for further development in providing a wider range of examples or arguments. This will add depth to your essay and demonstrate your ability to think critically and comprehensively about the topic.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using more varied linking words and phrases. This can help to create a smoother flow of ideas and make your essay more engaging to read.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are clear and concise, providing a solid framework for your argument.
logical structure
The essay presents a logical structure with distinct paragraphs that each tackle separate aspects of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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