Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome culture difference. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some people hold the notion that travellers to other countries ought to pursue local customs and behaviour.
On the contrary
, another idea is that the householder must show hospitality and accept another culture.
On the one hand, it goes without saying that plenty of people take the norm seriously. For example
, a typically ordinary person in Vietnam wants to share intangible cultural heritage such
as Hue royal refined music, Quan ho folk music, Southern amateur music, ca tru, and many more sentimental values. Obviously, the citizens wish to become friends with foreigners to display their spectacular traditions which made them proud. Others hold the notion that the newcomer should adhere to local customs and behaviour principles, it is so unfair for the sightseers because birds with the same feather flock together.
On the other hand
, culture is the root of a nation so protecting culture is protecting whole the country. In terms of the traditional, the demand for the discovery of new things in everyone is such
complicated that many individuals wonder about the sense of mystery of the differences so they research and try to act like an alien and stick out like a sore thumb.
In brief, we couldn’t urge anyone to do something, especially about customs and behaviour. Moreover
, every folk has their private principal so accept another one need to check it thoroughly. From my perspective, sightseers are our guests so we need to introduce our special and let them chill to have a fantastic vacation.Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay presents the main ideas for both viewpoints, but it needs a clearer, more comprehensive response to the task. Expand your arguments with more detailed examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
There are some logical progressions between sentences and paragraphs, but the overall structure could be improved. Ensure each paragraph flows better into the next, and reinforce the logical connection between points.
introduction conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the conclusion is a bit abrupt. Aim to summarize the main points more clearly and provide a more definitive closing statement.
supported main points
Consider using more specific examples or detailed evidence to support your points. This will make your essay more persuasive and informative.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of both sides of the argument. You've introduced the topic clearly and provided a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
There is a logical structure present in your essay. Each paragraph deals with a particular aspect of the argument, which helps the reader follow your thoughts.
coherence cohesion
Your use of rich vocabulary and diverse sentence structures makes the essay more engaging and enjoyable to read.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.