Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantanges outweigh the disadvamtages?

These days most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people depend on social media for communication and follow-up with news and
interested
Replace the word
interesting
show examples
events rather than buying
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
from markets or meeting others face to face. because it makes life easier for them.
firstly
, some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people do not have time to visit their friends or family
while
they are busy. they can communicate through the phone with each other, so it is easier for them and they can keep in touch with them most of the time.
however
, People need to try not to depend on phone calls, video calls and
chatting
Change the form of the verb
chat
show examples
for communication,
for example
, they can meet in person in their free time and try to do actual activities, to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
better communication in social life.
secondly
, To reach fast and easily the news and events they can use social apps anywhere and anytime they want.
on the other hand
, you cannot trust on social media, because some fake accounts could post incorrect news, or unreal events for
haking
Correct your spelling
hacking
show examples
phones.
For example
, maybe you will click on the event's link and they can reach your phone and stall money or data. so you have to make sure that you follow trusted accounts and not
follow
Verb problem
apply
show examples
random accounts who interested in being trending and having more followers and views.
finally
, Social media is essential in our lives and it is hard for us to not use it, but we have to make sure we use it the right way and not addicted to it.
Submitted by hadeelalnemari on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. Try to ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points. This will help in achieving a higher score for task response and making your argument more convincing.
task achievement
Make sure you completely address all parts of the task. You should weigh both the advantages and disadvantages in detail.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt at discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of social media.
coherence cohesion
Logical flow is present to some extent, making it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • to connect with friends and family
  • to preserve bonds
  • real-time updates
  • a wide range of perspectives
  • global happenings
  • business opportunities
  • networking opportunities
  • mental health issues
  • unrealistic portrayals of life
  • privacy breaches
  • identity theft
  • addiction
  • time management
  • productivity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: