In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shop using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will be happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

#future #people #shop #cash #payments #card #phones

methods of payment have changed over time and have taken various ways rather than

cash

. many people argue that

cash

will not be needed anymore and will be replaced by bank

cards

or mobile phone applications.

although

some people will not be

satisified

Correct your spelling

satisfied

with the new methods of payment, I think these alternative ways will be widely used in the future but

cash

will still be used. on one hand, Payments by

cards

Fix the agreement mistake

card

show examples

and phone applications will continue to expand

dut

Correct your spelling

due

show examples

to their ease of use,

accessabilty

Correct your spelling

accessibility

and safety.

most

Capitalize word

Most

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individuals will use

cards

to pay for

thier

Correct your spelling

their

amenities as they are more

easey

Correct your spelling

easy

to use.

Capitalize word

show examples

banks

offers

Change the verb form

offer

show examples

their

costumers

Correct your spelling

customers

show examples

advantage

Fix the agreement mistake

advantages

show examples

if they pay using

theri

Correct your spelling

their

cards

also

, banks try to provide the maximum security to protect their customer's money.

moreover

Add a comma

moreover,

show examples

many shops create mobile applications to make shopping and buying through mobile

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

more flexible and

attrctive

Correct your spelling

attractive

for instance

, amazon which is one of the most well-known

application

Change to a plural noun

applications

show examples

worldwide,

on the other hand

, many people argue that

cash

will still be needed. cyber

haking

Correct your spelling

hacking

show examples

is a major

problems

Change the noun form

problem

show examples

regarding saving money in banks.

Submitted by haderabouslema93 on Wed Aug 28 2024

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Grammar and Spelling

There are several spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'dut' should be 'due,' 'accessabilty' should be 'accessibility,' and 'costumers' should be 'customers.' Make sure to proofread your essay carefully.

Cohesion

Improve transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the overall flow of the essay. This will help in making your arguments more coherent and easier to follow.

Task Achievement

Add more specific examples and explanations. For instance, explain why some people might not feel comfortable using digital payments, like fear of technology or lack of access to it.

Coherence and Cohesion

Include a more robust conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your position. This will make your essay feel more complete and well-structured.

Task Achievement

Your essay addresses the prompt well by discussing both the potential for a cashless society and concerns people might have about this shift.

Relevance

You have provided reasons for why digital payments might become more popular in the future, such as convenience and security, which are relevant and effective points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

186 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shop using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will be happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that it is the best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argued that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many cities, the use of video cameras in public places is being increased in order to reduce crime, but some people believe that these measures restrict our individual freedom. Do the benefits of increased security outweigh the drawbacks?

Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be shut down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals.

In some countries a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe the best way to deal with the problem related to traffic and transportation is to encourage people to live in cities rather than in suburbs and the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree?