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Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#results #survey #people’s #coffee #tea #habits #five #australian #cities #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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The table depicts the outcomes of a
questionare
Correct your spelling
questionnaire
question
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 how often people buy and drink
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different types of
coffe
Correct your spelling
coffee
inn
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
Sydney
Use synonyms
, Melbourne,
Brisbane
Use synonyms
,
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 and
Hobart
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Australia. The first option is
bought
Change the verb form
to buy
show examples
 fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Sydney
Use synonyms
 has 43.7 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
city
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
 and has almost the same amount as Melbourne which is 42.2 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Brisbane
Use synonyms
 and
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 amount , 34.2 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Next,
Linking Words
Hobart
Use synonyms
 has 38.3 per
cent
Use synonyms
. The second line is bought instant
cofffe
Correct your spelling
coffee
 in
last
Linking Words
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
.
Brisbane
Use synonyms
 has 526 per
cent
Use synonyms
. Other two cities that have
amost
Correct your spelling
almost
 the same
number
Use synonyms
 are
Adelaide
Use synonyms
, 49.8 per
cent
Use synonyms
. The lowest
number
Use synonyms
 is 45.5 per
cent
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
Sydney
Change preposition
of Sydney
show examples
 and the highest
number
Use synonyms
 is 54,1 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
hobart
Change the capitalization
Hobart
show examples
. The
last
Linking Words
 option of the survey shows the percentage of
city
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
 that went to a
cafe
Use synonyms
' for
coffee
Use synonyms
 or
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 two
weeks
Use synonyms
. In
Use synonyms
sydney
Change the capitalization
Sydney
show examples
, people went to a
cafe
Use synonyms
 for
coffee
Use synonyms
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
 61 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
city
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
. In
Brisbane
Use synonyms
 , citizens went to a
cafe
Use synonyms
 for
coffee
Use synonyms
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
 55.4 per
cent
Use synonyms
. The lowest is
Adelaide
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 shows 49.9 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
city
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
. In
Hobart
Use synonyms
, people went to a
cafe
Use synonyms
 for
coffe
Correct your spelling
coffee
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
 62.7 per
cent
Use synonyms
. The highest is Melbourne
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 shows 63.3 per
cent
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of the survey is the percentage of
city
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
 that went
tıı
Correct your spelling
to
 a
cafe
Use synonyms
 for
coffee
Use synonyms
 or
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4
weeks
Use synonyms
 because it shows almost the highest percentage in 3 types.
Submitted by Yasar Khan on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sydney, brisbane, adelaide, hobart, coffee, weeks, cent, city, residents, number, cafe, tea with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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