The pie chart shows the number of people who were using different languages online. the table shows the average number of people online each year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparations where relevant.
There is a table that
provide
the average number of individuals online from November 1997 to August 2001. Change the verb form
provides
Also
, it can be seen the percentage of those people
to
the world population. Change preposition
in
At the end
of 1997, there were only 76 millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
of
Change preposition
apply
people
online and they were only 1.8% of the total living people
. On
August 2001, the number increased to 513 Change preposition
In
millions
. Change to singular
million
Also
, the ratio of the people
was almost 5 times higher than 1997
. It can be said that there is an Change preposition
in 1997
increasing
Replace the word
increase
of
number year by year because Change preposition
in
in
the chart, there Add the comma(s)
, in
are
529 Wrong verb form
were
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
of
Change preposition
apply
people
online at the end
of 2001.
On the other hand
, different languages which individuals use online can be found in the chart. It can be seen that almost half of the
human beings use Correct article usage
apply
English
language. The most second used language is Japanese with 8.9%. Change the article
the English
Additionally
, Chinese, German, and Spanish is
following with 8.8%, 6.8%, and 6.5% respectively. After that, the most used languages are Korean, Italian, French, Portuguese, and Dutch. Only 10% of the Change the verb form
are
people
use other languages.Submitted by bloodylady on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, at the end".
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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