IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

In the future, more people will chose to go on holidays in their own country and not travel abroad on holidays. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
in the future, more
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 will
chose
Change the verb form
choose

The verb chose after the modal verb will does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
 to go on
holidays
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in their own
country
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and not travel abroad on
holidays
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. in the future
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 may not be in
same
Change the article
the same

It appears that the phrase same country does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

show examples
country
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
with
Change preposition
as

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
 their family
at
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
holidays
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 because of many reasons like work and migration or many other reasons, some of them see that in future
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 may
can
Verb problem
be able to

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
because
Add the preposition
because of

It appears that there is a missing preposition after the word because. Consider adding a preposition.

show examples
 the new roads and inside
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling

The spelling of traveling is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples
. some countries are not that big they can go for
holidays
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in the
country
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in my opinion. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

show examples
 do not agree with them, the reason that
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

show examples
 disagree
for
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
is that most
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 are not in the same
country
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 with their
famiries
Correct your spelling
families

If you don’t want famiries to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

because
work
Change preposition
of work

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
 or any other reason.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your essay more clearly. Start with an introduction where you introduce your main point. Follow this with body paragraphs that each focus on a single idea or reason, providing examples and explanations. Finally, conclude by summarizing your points and reiterating your argument.
task achievement
Try to make your argument clearer by elaborating on your points. Provide specific examples or reasons that help explain why you believe that more people will or won’t choose to go on holidays in their own country in the future.
linguistic accuracy
Improve the language accuracy and variety to make your points clearer. Pay attention to grammar, punctuation, and spelling to enhance the readability of your essay.
task achievement
You have expressed a clear opinion on the topic, which is the first step in building a persuasive argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay touches upon relevant points such as work, migration, and transportation infrastructure, which are important factors in the discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: