The graphs show figures relating to hours worked and stress level amongs professionals in eight groups. Describe the information shown to a university or coollage lecurer.
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The bar chart shows the average hours of working in several fields.
While
,
the pie chart illustrates the stress burdens happening in every job shown.
Remove the comma
apply
Overall
, it can be seen that professions
Replace the word
professionals
such
as business
Correct your spelling
businessmen
men
and movie producers have been working with the
average time is higher than Correct article usage
an
other kind
of jobs. Change the wording
another kind
other kinds
Whereas
, lecturers and doctors affect more people suffering from stress.
On the one hand, business
Correct your spelling
businessmen
men
have around 70 hours work
time Change preposition
of work
for
every single week and it becomes the highest average duration. Change preposition
apply
On the other hand
, chefs and lecturers have similar
proportion which is around 30 hours per week. These mean that working time is around twofold lower than the Correct article usage
a similar
business
Correct your spelling
businessmen
men
.
The highest percentage of individuals which suffers from mental illness comes from lecturers and doctors with the same proportion which is 25% followed by movie producers and business
Correct your spelling
businessmen
men
with the total value slightly lower 20% and roughly one to ten respectively. By contrast
, writers account for the lowest burden with only 5% workers
Change preposition
of workers
should suffer
from stress.Wrong verb form
suffering
Submitted by hikmanurdin04 on
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Vocabulary: Replace the words business, men with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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