IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

You recently saw an advertisement about a business conference that can be helpful for your work. Write a letter to your manager asking permission to attend the conference. In your letter, say: what the conference is about how you know about the conference explain to him/her why it is important that you attend this conference You should write at least 150 words.

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to ask to tell you about the conference meeting
that is
Linking Words
 being held
this
Linking Words
 upcoming Sunday. I was amazed when I saw an advertisement for a business conference and that's why, I am asking permission to attend
this
Linking Words
 event. It is one the biggest events where I will have a chance to get knowledge and information about the current business scenario and
also
Linking Words
, will get in touch with new contacts who can be helpful for my work. Because one of my friends attended
this
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 event
last
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 time and got knowledge about the market which helped him a lot in his job, he suggested I become part of
this
Linking Words
 type of conference. As we are going to work on the new foreign project, I would like to join the same event from where I can get work-based information which will help me to work effectively. Kindly approve my decision and permit me to attend
this
Linking Words
 meeting. Yours Faithfully, Ankit Patel

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task achievement
Make sure to clarify the specific details about the conference, such as its name or main theme, to provide more context for your request.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by clearly outlining each main point in separate paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You included a respectful greeting and closing, which is very professional.
task achievement
Your writing tone is suitable for requesting permission from a manager.
task achievement
You mentioned how the conference is relevant to your upcoming project, which strengthens your request.
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