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Band 6.5

The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children’s activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate. Write a report for a university lecturer and report the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children’s activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate. Write a report for a university lecturer and report the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#graphs #show #survey #children’s #activities #first #leisure #boys #second #girls #report #university #lecturer #features #comparisons
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The graph illustrates children's activity by gender based on a survey's results.
Overall
Linking Words
, both genders have three activities which unique to them,
as well as
Linking Words
 three shared activities
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which are reading,
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
, and listening to
music
Use synonyms
. Females accounted for
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 reading fraction than males, whilst males had
bigger
Add an article
a bigger
show examples
 portion in
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
 compared to females and both sexes constituted the same regarding
music
Use synonyms
 listening. Taking a look at what boys do in their free time, sports like basketball and soccer comprised
for
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apply
show examples
26% and 17% respectively.
Then
Linking Words
 skateboarding with just 11% and enjoying
music
Use synonyms
 with 10%, reading made the smallest slice with just 2%,
in contrast
Linking Words
 to
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
 that had the highest percentage of 34. Turning to
girls'
Correct article usage
the girls'
show examples
 chart,
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 popular activity is dancing with 27%
following
Wrong verb form
followed
show examples
 by reading with 21%. They have
smaller
Add an article
a smaller
show examples
 fraction in
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
 in comparison to boys, with just 16%,
physical
Correct word choice
and physical
show examples
 activity which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 netball and gymnastics made up 26% collectively. Listening to
music
Use synonyms
 percentage is equal to that of
boys'
Change noun form
boys
show examples
.
Submitted by remasalotaibi678 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, games, music with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • cultural and leisure activities
  • participation rates
  • gender differences
  • popular/preferred activity
  • percentages
  • contrasts/comparisons
  • similar interest levels
  • trends
  • significantly
  • unexpected findings
  • summarizing
  • key differences/similarities
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