Today, wordly corona virus widespread becpome every nation problem, including education sector and it make many educational officrs and experts suggest the government to spent more budget for free internet access. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
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Nowadays, Covid-19 become the paramount health problem all over the world. More and more spheres of everyday life have been conveyed to the online format, especially education. some people are convinced that the government have to contribute money to allow free internet access for all of the students.
This
essay fully agrees with this
statement for several reasons.
First and foremost, basic education is one of the human rights, in my humble opinion the paramount one. So, if the worldwide governments have decided about the pandemic, they have to understand the consequences, furthermore
, they have to provide maximal support for their citizens. Otherwise
, the human rights would be violated.
Secondly
, I am convinced, that internet access is the basic right of people. It's the
essential source of knowledge, news, and entertainment. So, all of the people, either in developed countries or developing countries have to be able to use the web net. Correct article usage
an
Moreover
, students who haven't opportunity to buy a laptop or a tablet,
must have government support to do it. Remove the comma
apply
For instance
, in Canada, there is a social program of helping
with gadgets for weak layers of the citizens. You have to write a letter with an explanation, attach the letter from your bank, and if it's suitable - your child will have a laptop for free.
In conclusion, I believe that the main responsibility of any government is the well-being of its population, which includes its education in all formats. That's why all governments have to be concerned about gadgets for all and internet access for free.Change preposition
to help
Submitted by anastasia on
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grammar
The essay addresses the prompt well but there are some minor grammatical and lexical errors (e.g., 'paramount health problem', 'have to contribute', 'have to provide'). Consider revising these to ensure clarity and accuracy. Revisions like 'the most significant health problem', 'should contribute', and 'should provide' could make the text smoother.
vocabulary
Provide more specific and varied vocabulary to fully express your thoughts and examples. Try to avoid repeating the same structures or phrases.
elaboration
Try to elaborate more on your points to make your arguments even stronger. For instance, explain further how free internet access will benefit students' education and overall well-being.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding the main points.
evidence
You provided relevant examples, such as the social program in Canada, which adds credibility and specificity to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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