As society changes, more and more people do not want to stay in one career or job. Many people change their careers and jobs. What is the cause of this phenomenon? Can you give some suggestions to solve this problem?

Careers and
jobs
are very important in man's life when they reach the age that they have to earn
for
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apply
show examples
a living for their family. It serves as bread and butter for our daily lives.
However
,most people tend to change their careers and
jobs
even
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
are working for years.
According to
some
researches
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research
show examples
, there are reasons that cause
this
phenomenon very visible to working individuals.
Firstly
, they are searching for a higher salary as their current compensation in their
jobs
do
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does
show examples
not comply
on
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with
show examples
their daily needs anymore.
For example
, when people
recieve
Correct your spelling
receive
a low wage they tend to be enough,but when their salary is getting higher they will ask for more.
Secondly
, they are not happy in their
jobs
anymore. It is proven that people working in the same job for many years
to be
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are
show examples
unhappy, they are searching for more challenging
role
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roles
show examples
since they are working for specific
job
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jobs
show examples
for a long period of time.
To conclude
,
this
problem can be solved through the combined efforts of different agencies connected to different
jobs
. The government may give
an
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apply
show examples
additional compensation for a worker depending on their job.
Therefore
,if the workers are properly compensated, they will be happy in their work and will not quit
in
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apply
show examples
their
jobs
anymore.
Submitted by rodadoctor2 on

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task achievement
Work on providing clearer and more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This will help in making your essay more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using transitional phrases can make your essay flow more naturally.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your essay well.
task achievement
You identified two main reasons why people change careers, which makes your essay focused.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career transition
  • job mobility
  • dynamic job market
  • work-life balance
  • obsolescence
  • workspace flexibility
  • skill development
  • lifelong learning
  • burnout
  • entrepreneurship
  • job satisfaction
  • career counseling
  • job security
  • technological advancements
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