Some people prefer to relax by doing physical activities, while others choose mental activities such as crossword puzzles or chess. Discuss the both views and include your own opinion

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It is important to unwind after a long duty. Some individuals choose physical
activities
to relax rather than other people who prefer
brain
activities
such
as puzzles or playing chess. From my perspective, it
depend
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
on person to person, because the methods of relaxation are different for everyone. I will support my opinion with arguments in the essay below.
To begin
with, it is a viable option for some humans to play real-time
games
to relax after hard duty.
For example
, playing football, cricket, tennis etc has a fundamental effect on our
body
.
Additionally
,
Games
play a significant role in our lives. It not only makes us healthy and fit but
also
makes us active for the next day.
Hence
, I wholeheartedly believe that
,
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apply
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physical activity is a great thing to relax.
Secondly
, Mental
activities
such
as playing
games
, which include
brain
work , not
body
Add an article
the body
a body
show examples
.
Furthermore
,
this
not only boosts our memory strength but
also
makes us make quick decisions. To illustrate, chess is an ancient game, the greatest kings play these
games
to expand their
brain
memory, so they can think broadly.
On the other hand
,
according to
many researchers, puzzles are not only good for adolescents but
also
for adults' mental health. So, activity by the
brain
is as important as activity by the
body
. In conclusion, some are tired by the
brain
rather than the
body
, so it depends on the person. Whether
,
Remove the comma
apply
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physical
activities
suit them or mental
activities
.
Activities
are important, no matter its
a
Correct article usage
apply
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physical or mental.
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task achievement
Try to ensure grammatical accuracy and consistency throughout the essay to improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Expand your arguments with more specific examples and detailed explanations to better support your points.
introduction conclusion present
The essay includes both an introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your discussion.
complete response
You presented both perspectives clearly and provided appropriate reasoning for your views.
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