You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: · Explain your varied achievements over the past two years · Express your interest in growing with the company · Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion

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Hello Brad, I am writing
this
letter to show my interest in the job opening for the role of Supervisor which
have been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
posted on the company's website
last
night. My name is Simran and I have been working with the company
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
last
Correct article usage
the last
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two years in the sales department.
Last
month, only I
have been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
awarded
with
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the 100% attendance award. Because of my
achievements
Add a comma
achievements,
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I have been awarded as employee of the year for the 2023 annual year.
Moreover
, I was one of the employees who went for the international presentation which was held in Mumbai, India.
Furthermore
, I am very excited to grow up in the corporate. I have already applied for the position online the very moment I saw the job posting. Well, working for the company is like a dream come true for me and I would like to grow to keep myself motivated. If possible, could you please take
out
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some time from your very busy next week's schedule to discuss the promotion
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Thank you so much for your time. Eagerly waiting for your response. Yours sincerely, Simran.
Submitted by kaur75971 on

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grammar
Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical errors, such as 'have been posted' which should be 'was posted' and 'from last two years' should be 'for the last two years.'
coherence
The logical structure is clear, but try enhancing the flow between paragraphs to make the reading experience smoother.
task response
Providing specific achievements like sales targets or other quantifiable successes can add more weight to your request.
task response
You've clearly outlined your achievements and expressed your interest in growing with the company, which aligns well with the task requirements.
suitable writing tone
The letter has a polite and respectful tone, appropriate for a professional setting.
greeting and closing
The closing and greeting are well-crafted and polite, enhancing the overall professional tone.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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