Some people argue that it is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
A number of individuals feel that having a
job
that brings enjoyment is more significant than earning a high income, while
others argue that a good salary is essential for a better quality of life
. In my opinion, both aspects are important, but striking a balance between job
satisfaction
and financial stability is ideal.
On the one hand, there are instances where people prioritize job
satisfaction
over money. For instance
, in India, some individuals may not find their work enjoyable because their employers do not inspire or motivate them. This
lack of inspiration can lead to a lack of interest in their job
, resulting in decreased productivity and overall
job
satisfaction
.
On the other hand
, there exist instances wherein a meager
income can precipitate adverse ramifications on the livelihoods of individuals. Change the spelling
meagre
For example
, within the context of Uzbekistan, a considerable portion of the populace grapples with receiving inadequate remuneration, thereby engendering financial hardships, restricted opportunities for healthcare and education, and an overarching diminution in quality of life
. In these scenarios, a substantial salary can markedly enhance standards of living and furnish a sense of financial stability.
To sum up
, whilst having an enjoyable job
is paramount for overall
happiness and job
contentment, a good salary is additionally
crucial for a better quality of life
. Striking a balance between job
satisfaction
and financial stability is key to leading a fulfiling
and comfortable Correct your spelling
fulfilling
life
. Ultimately, people should aim to find a job
that brings them joy whereas
Correct word choice
while
also
ensuring they are adequately compensated for their work.Submitted by omondavlat91 on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses both views comprehensively, but the examples could be more specific and detailed to strengthen your arguments. Adding more real-life scenarios or evidence can make your points more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-structured, there are some areas where the transition between sentences and paragraphs can be smoother. Ensuring more fluidity in your writing but maintaining clarity would enhance coherence.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are strong, effectively setting up the discussion and summarizing your viewpoint.
logical structure
You maintained a logical structure throughout the essay, making it easy to follow your train of thought.
supported main points
You adequately supported your main points, making clear distinctions between the opposing views and your own stance.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, reflecting a balanced viewpoint.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.