Some people say that getting to Universities is the sole way to get success while others say that it depends on the other factors. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

The question of whether or not attending
university
is the only pathway to
achievement
has sparked sizeable debate.
while
a few argue that
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college schooling is crucial for achieving
achievement
, others contend that various factors make a contribution to an individual’s accomplishments.
on
Change preposition
In
show examples
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explore both perspectives and provide an explanation for why I agree
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
success
is influenced via
a
Change the article
an
show examples
aggregate of schooling, personal attributes, and outside occasions. Proponents of the view that college education is critical for
achievement
frequently factor
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
the increasing needs of the task market. Many professions require superior levels, and employers often prioritize applicants with higher schooling credentials. In fields inclusive of medicinal
drug
Fix the agreement mistake
drugs
show examples
, regulation, and engineering, a
university
degree is not just beneficial
however
Correct word choice
but
show examples
important.
moreover
, universities offer valuable talents, expertise, and networking opportunities which can decorate
profession
Replace the word
professional
show examples
prospects.
Conversely
, numerous
a
Replace the word
successful
show examples
success
individuals have finished their desires
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
attending
university
.
This
highlights that
success
isn't totally determined by means of formal training. factors including entrepreneurial spirit, sensible experience, and determination regularly play massive roles in accomplishing
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
.
moreover
, vocational schooling and apprenticeships can provide people with the skills needed for specific careers, every so often leading to outcomes that rival the ones of
university
graduates. In conclusion, whilst
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
schooling may be a valuable asset, it isn't the only course to
achievement
. A mixture of training, non-public characteristics, and external factors
make contributions
Verb problem
contribute
show examples
to an individual's achievements, underscoring the diversity of paths to
success
.
Submitted by albaraaalsufyani3 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To achieve a higher score, ensure that each paragraph has clear and specific examples to substantiate your points. This will make your arguments more robust and convincing.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to capitalization and punctuation. For instance, 'while' at the beginning should be capitalized, and proper nouns like 'University' should also be capitalized consistently.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by discussing both perspectives on the topic, demonstrating clear and comprehensive ideas.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, contributing to a logical and coherent structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: