A person worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old fashion values such as honor, kindness and trust no longer seem important. To what extent you agree or disagree
there is no doubt that
people
beeing
judgemental in Correct your spelling
being
the
modern life,but in the past Correct article usage
apply
were
Correct your spelling
where
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
has
Wrong verb form
had
his
value,there are some reasons Correct pronoun usage
its
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
be consider
in Change the verb form
be considered
this
proplem
.
Correct your spelling
problem
in
my side,I Change preposition
On
a gree
that our current era seems to have a gap, owing to Correct your spelling
agree
the
social media,which is the main reason that played a major change Correct article usage
apply
of
Change preposition
in
people
attitudes Change noun form
people's
towads
each Correct your spelling
toward
others
.Change to a singular noun
other
otherwise
in the past Capitalize word
Otherwise
eara
when Correct your spelling
era
people
had a little opennes and deep inderstandig of life and self worth.
Morever
, there is some Correct your spelling
Moreover
disadvantge
in both Correct your spelling
disadvantage
disadvantages
eares
Correct your spelling
areas
such
as the person in the past might have a
social status Add a missing verb
had a
defnitions
of his own which is not clear unlike the modern social Correct your spelling
definitions
definition
staute
, which is fame and Correct your spelling
status
wealthy
,beauty.
Replace the word
wealth
however
,social status rely
on the person Change the verb form
relies
ethir
Correct your spelling
they
was
in the past or in the present.
despite the fact that social media and the Correct subject-verb agreement
were
disappering
of old fashion values, Correct your spelling
disappearing
the
history Correct article usage
apply
some times
Correct your spelling
sometimes
dose
not Correct your spelling
does
repit
his self in Correct your spelling
repeat
a
way or another.
Correct determiner usage
one
to sum up
, history change and people
also
change their vaules
and Correct your spelling
values
life style
,and there is no wrong with that until we become judgemental.Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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coherence cohesion
The essay has a number of spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'beeing', 'proplem', 'a gree', 'towads', 'eares', 'staute', and 'inderstandig'. These errors often obscure the meaning and need to be corrected for clarity and readability.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main point and development. The essay currently lacks a coherent progression of ideas and jumps between different points without clear transitions.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion need to be more defined. The introduction should clearly state the main argument or perspective on the topic, while the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points discussed and restate the writer's stance.
task achievement
The essay lacks specific examples to support the arguments made. Including relevant and specific examples can illustrate points more powerfully and make the argument more convincing.
task achievement
The ideas presented in the essay should be clearer and more comprehensive. Currently, the main points are somewhat vague and underdeveloped. Elaborate more on each point to give a thorough and clear explanation.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address the issue of judgment based on social status and material possessions versus old-fashioned values such as honor, kindness, and trust.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.