Some believe that school children should not be given homework by their teacher, whereas other argue that homework plays an important role in education of the children. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

A group of individuals think that the teachers in schools should not give
homework
to their
students
.
However
, another group of people believe that
homework
is one of the most essential parts of
children
's education. In my opinion,
students
are really struggling
while
doing
homework
,
nevertheless
,
homework
is an inalienable demand, that
students
have to do. Indeed, nowadays most
students
are bored with doing
homework
, and
due to
the large volume of
homework
, they cannot find any
time
to interact with their parents and siblings. Actually, if teachers stop to give any
homework
,
students
will spend their ti me with their parents, siblings and pets, these actions will bring a lot of both physical and mental benefits.
Moreover
, if number of
homework
is decreased, most
children
who have their own hobbies
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
will dedicate more
time
to activities that they really enjoy doing.
For example
,
children
who tend to read books and play football will have more
time
to do it.
On the other hand
, if the number of given
homework
is less, most
students
that have harmful or useless hobbies, will abuse
this
opportunity and degrade a lot.
In addition
, there are numerous count of different school programs in different subjects, that are to be practised and repeated after a certain
time
, without
homework
, a big share of
students
that do not repeat the knowledge that they have done in school, are more tend to forget and lose that knowledge.
Thus
, in case
homework
is removed from the school programme,
students
will have a lot of free
time
that they cannot use properly
due to
their young and unexperienced minds, but, if they had
homework
to do during their free
time
, they would do it and improve their discipline that leads to successful future. In conclusion, in
this
statement, both views have their own advantages,
however
, if
children
do
homework
, they could take more benefits from that, compared with the case that they have not.
Submitted by berlinastanalll on

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task achievement
While the essay correctly addresses the prompt and discusses both views, it would benefit from a clearer and more explicit positioning statement in the thesis for better clarity.
task achievement
Some ideas tend to be slightly repetitive or lacking in clarity. Make sure to express ideas more comprehensively, possibly by giving more concrete examples.
coherence cohesion
There are some minor grammatical mistakes and awkward sentences that affect the flow. Revising these errors would make the essay smoother and easier to read.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each idea flows logically and follows on from the previous one. This can be achieved by using more cohesive devices and connectors.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion by presenting both sides of the argument, which aligns well with the requirements of the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is clear with distinct paragraphs dedicated to each viewpoint. This helps in organizing your arguments well.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and gives a final opinion, adding to the cohesiveness of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Reinforces
  • Understanding
  • Material
  • Discipline
  • Responsibility
  • Time management
  • Critical thinking
  • Stress
  • Burnout
  • Mental health
  • Well-being
  • Inequality
  • Resources
  • Academic performance
  • Circumstances
  • Meaningful
  • Purposeful
  • Concepts
  • Skills
  • Support
  • Engaging
  • Assessment
  • Traditional
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