Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations

These days several individuals think that it is ordinary to receive the worst circumstances,

for instance

crisis of financial or work .

However

, others consider

this

view which is to attempt and make it better.

This

essay will debate both of these situations

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

also

give my possess opinion. The first point is nowadays many

people

are working

unsatisfactory

Change the adjective

unsatisfactorily

show examples

which is why the reasons they do not like their own

jobs

, but they do not want to fight for themselves, which means looking for new

jobs

and living better in the future than now.

For example

, some companies work a long time with their employee and pay less payment, which is unfair in society, but

people

who do not

complaints

Replace the word

complain

show examples

, will afraid

lose

Fix the infinitive

to lose

show examples

their

jobs

As a result

, they will accept unquality work and lack of money.

On the other hand

, other positive individuals never receive those circumstances, because they always look for

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

new opportunities for the better in life.

Also

, these

people

who have already known their own aim and inner power.

Consequently

, they can be successful in their own life, which few

people

usually do to get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

higher positions

jobs

. In conclusion, many individuals can change their lives, because it is up to them to choose. In my opinion, If you just experience that bad situation, you will not be satisfied in your entire life.

However

, in the world, who can

hardworking

Add a missing verb

be hardworking

show examples

and take risks that person would win.

Submitted by a80906789 on Sat Sep 07 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction. It will make your essay more compelling and easier to follow.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This helps in making your argument more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Focus on improving the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Transitional phrases can help to connect your ideas more effectively.

task achievement

You have addressed both views of the topic, which is good for a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, providing a clear structure.

task achievement

You have made good attempts at some complex sentences, which adds variety to your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

243 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects to acquire more knowledge, while other people believe they should learn a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Recently, the phenomenon of education has become a heated debate,on one hand some people believe that quantety is imoprtant ,while on the other hand we see that guality is the concern of peple toward students.I reckon that kowing less subject ,but in details is a plus for tutors ,also I intend to discus both views throughout this essay .
4
band
many people think that to become a successful specialist, it is better to choose a career early in life and never change it later. Do you agree or disagree?
Our brain might not design to learn about all of knowledges in the world. Although someone has a high IQ test will mastery more than one subject, that is better if you have plan to select one of them. I believe that focused on a special subject will has a significant impact to reduce a time and get more changes to reach a success life.
7
band
some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country ? Descuss both view and tell you own idea
Some argue for mandatory work in a specific study location, while others champion the freedom to work in various countries. Personally, I align with the latter perspective.
4.5
band
Some people believe that the country would benefit a lot from a large number of young people who enter into university; however, others think that the large number of people receiving the education of university only leads to graduate unemployment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Many Individuals think that the country would benefit from a large number of young people who enter university. Others assume the large number of people studying at university will cause unemployment graduate. I strongly believe that a huge quantity of young people who decide to continue their tertiary education at university will have positive and negative impacts. I personally think that a university education is still crucial for young people but it must have a guarantee to be accompanied by additional skills.
6.5
band
Task 2: In many part of the world, people do research on their family history. Some people believe that finding our about previous generations is a usefull thing to do However, others believe that it is better to focus on present and future generation. Discuss both view and give your opinion?
Perhaps, there is no topic of controversy in this contemporary society worth debating as the matter of family history (ancestral lineage). Indeed, people's views differ greatly as to whether some human investigate the history of their own family while some people believe focus on present and future of heritage comprehension In this essay, it shall discuss both views from which my opinion about this matter shall be formed.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects to acquire more knowledge, while other people believe they should learn a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

many people think that to become a successful specialist, it is better to choose a career early in life and never change it later. Do you agree or disagree?

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country ? Descuss both view and tell you own idea

Task 2: In many part of the world, people do research on their family history. Some people believe that finding our about previous generations is a usefull thing to do However, others believe that it is better to focus on present and future generation. Discuss both view and give your opinion?