IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart shows Australian home Internet use by reasons and age groups. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart shows Australian home Internet use by reasons and age groups. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The charts illustrate the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 in Australia about the reasons for using the
internet
Use synonyms
 and
classified
Wrong verb form
classify
show examples
 the
people
Use synonyms
 based on
age
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, emailing was the main reason for browsing the
internet
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 from all divided
age
Use synonyms
 groups
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 for sending
emails
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, young
people
Use synonyms
 browse the
internet
Use synonyms
 for social networking compared with paying the bills online or online banking. Sending
emails
Use synonyms
 was the main purpose for using the
internet
Use synonyms
 in Australia. All the
people
Use synonyms
 in Australia used the
Internet
Use synonyms
 for sending their
emails
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
 more than 60% of
people
Use synonyms
 paid their online bills or banking.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 (around 60%) of Australians were active in social networking. Regarding social networking, younger were using the
Internet
Use synonyms
 more than any other
age
Use synonyms
 group. The
age
Use synonyms
 between 15-24 years was a higher
percentage
Use synonyms
 (more than 80%)
while
Linking Words
 more than 20% of
people
Use synonyms
 were 65 years or more.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in terms of paying online bills or online banking, children and older were less active.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, 25-34 years old
people
Use synonyms
 used the
internet
Use synonyms
 for
this
Linking Words
 which was the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 category.
Moreover
Linking Words
, more than 80% of
people
Use synonyms
 from all
age
Use synonyms
 groups sent their
emails
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, people, internet, age, emails with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • predominant
  • usage patterns
  • highlighting variations
  • compare and contrast
  • primary reasons
  • identify differences
  • age brackets
  • usage purposes
  • popularity
  • online shopping
  • banking
  • Internet use
  • age groups
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