Many people think that the behaviour of professional sportsmen/sportswomen on or off the field is not important as long as they are good players.To what extent do you agree or disagree with it ?

Sports
Change the noun form
Sport
show examples
is an important aspect
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
every nation. A large number of people say that professional sportsperson's
behaviour
is not
Vital
Correct article usage
a Vital
show examples
point whether off
field
Add an article
the field
show examples
or on
field
Add an article
the field
show examples
as long as they are good
players
. I strongly disagree with
this
statement, and
this
essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons
..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
To commence with, a good
Sports
person should! maintain his
behaviour
in
correct
Correct article usage
the correct
show examples
way even if he plays
good
Change the word
well
show examples
because many people take them as role models So they always maintain some decorum.
That is
to say, they are not only
sports
players
but
also
celebrities, So Spotlight is inevitable for their professional and personal
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
For example
, Some Indian cricket
players
were
accompained
Correct your spelling
accompanied
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
their
girlfriend
Fix the agreement mistake
girlfriends
show examples
when the
last
year of
ICC
Correct article usage
the ICC
show examples
match, but they did not perform well, and
as a result
, fans were blamed
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
their personal life was the major reason
of lost
Change preposition
for losing
show examples
the match.
In other words
, Professional
sports
players
' behaviours
are first come
Change to the active voice
first come
have first come
show examples
before their performance.
Furthermore
,
Sports
player should be
discipling
Correct your spelling
disciplined
in their
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lives because
sports
require
discipline
.
This
is, if a
sports
Person does not be
discipline
Wrong verb form
disciplined
show examples
how he plays in the
field
with
discipline
, so
sports
and behaviours are interconnected.
For instance
, in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
Soccer match,
players
Change noun form
players'
player's
show examples
behaviour
insight the
field
is more essential
besides
they will get a red card between
match
Fix the agreement mistake
matches
show examples
.
Hence
, sportsmen Should follow and maintain their
behaviour
. In conclusion, Professional sportsmen's
behaviour
is crucial
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Add an article
the off
show examples
off
Add a hyphen
off-field
show examples
field
and
on
Add a hyphen
on-field
show examples
field
because they are
being
Verb problem
apply
show examples
role models for
normal
Correct article usage
the normal
show examples
population
along
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with
sports
need
Correct pronoun usage
that need
show examples
Some
discipline
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
behavioural activities.
Therefore
, I Strongly disagree,
this
Professional
players
'
behaviour
is Vital as long as they are good.
Players
.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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task achievement
Strengthen the use of relevant and specific examples. While there is an example given about Indian cricket players, more concrete details would further illustrate the arguments.
coherence cohesion
Improve sentence structure and grammar. There are several sentences that are unclear due to grammatical issues, especially concerning verb tense and subject-verb agreement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure consistent terminology and phrasing. Phrases like 'Professional players' behaviour is Vital as long as they are good. Players.' can be rephrased for clarity and coherence.
task achievement
Clear introduction that outlines the main argument and a conclusion that summarizes the points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Logical progression of ideas with a clear structure for each paragraph.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • role model
  • visibility
  • influence
  • reputation
  • sponsorship deals
  • financial stability
  • disciplinary actions
  • teamwork
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • integrity
  • positively influence
  • undermine
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