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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the chart shows the percentage of male and female teachers in six different types of education setting in the uK in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the chart shows the percentage of male and female teachers in six different types of education setting in the uK in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The provided graph illustrates the proportion of male and female
teachers
Use synonyms
 in six education types in the British in 2010. The six education types are nursery or pre-
school
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, primary
school
Use synonyms
, secondary
school
Use synonyms
, college, private training institute, and university. It can be clearly seen that
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
each type had
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 own majority, even significantly different.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, only
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the college had
same
Change the article
the same
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 amount of men and women
teachers
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.  The majority of female
teachers
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dominantly
happened
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in
pre-
Correct your spelling
preschool
show examples
school
Use synonyms
 and primary
school
Use synonyms
, with approximately 95% and upper than 90%, respectively.
On secondary
Change preposition
Secondary
show examples
Use synonyms
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
also
Linking Words
 had female
teachers
Use synonyms
 as their majority (less than 60%), which was not as significant as pre-
school
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 and primary
school
Use synonyms
.  Meanwhile, in higher
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
 of education
such
Linking Words
 as private training
institute
Fix the agreement mistake
institutes
show examples
 and
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
show examples
 in the United Kingdom,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
female teacher was the minority. The percentage of male
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 in university was 70%
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to the female with only 30% of the teacher.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words teachers, school with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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