The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

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The pie charts below illustrate the retail sectors of sales for online shopping in New Zealand in two years, more precisely in 2003 and 2013.

Overall

, the price for travel consisted in the top 2 in both years.

While

prices for books and for music, the film gets

last

2 places in 2003 and 2013 respectively. In 2003 non-offline sales for retail sectors of books had above one-fifth. With

such

that results was clothes which had 21%. In the same period, travel had 3% more than one-third.

By contrast

, online sales of film and music were approximately one-fourth. At the other time, non-online produce for retail sectors of clothes had exactly one-

third,

which gave him a leader

this

year. Travel had 4% less than a leader of

this

year. Film and music had one-sixth. And pre-

last

figure books had slightly more than one-fifth.

This

means his performance in both years was in the range of 19 and 22 per cent respectively.

Submitted by bizhanalikhan6 on Sun Sep 08 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 89%.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

161 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Comparative analysis
E-commerce
Retail sectors
Growth rate
Decade
Decline
Trends
Online transactions
Consumer behavior
Market share
Significant increase/decrease
Digital era
Accessibility
User-friendly platform
Market dynamics
Predictive outlook

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The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Rich people are getting richer, and poor people are getting poorer. The gap between rich and poor people is widening. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?

In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet.

Some people think that too much attention and too many resources are given to the protection of wild animal and birds. Do you agree or disagree?

Some educationists think that international exchange visits will benefit the teenagers at the school. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

What do you think about celebrities? Are celebrities good or bad for you?