Money management should be taught at school. Do you agree?
It is universally acknowledged that
money
plays a crucial role in people
Change noun form
people's
prosperous
. Presently, financial Replace the word
prosperity
management
is learned in community
through experience after Add an article
the community
adolescent
. Replace the word
adolescence
However
, it is argued that financial skills should be taught at school to equip juveniles in global
market and guarantee their future. I totally agree with Add an article
the global
this
statement due to
its abundant of
benefits. Change preposition
apply
This
essay will express the supportive reasons for this
notion.
Financial management
is an important skill
that should be learned along with
other courses and skills. This
skill
could help minors to be skilled in saving, spending and earning money
as well. In addition
, in recent days, stock marketing is a popular way of investing money
which requires knowledge to predict the financial charts in global
market. Learning Add an article
the global
this
skill
in
a young age could pave Change preposition
at
their
way to have welfare lifestyles Change the word
the
as well as
studying in Correct pronoun usage
their favorite
favorite
field. Change the spelling
favourite
For example
, if a student who was not skilled in financial management
become
an engineer and Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
then
they suddenly bankrupt; this
financial skill
will play a backup role for them to reconstruct their lives.
The second reason is assisting
Change preposition
to assisting
family
through Fix the agreement mistake
families
financially educating
Replace the word
financial education
children
. In the modern era, new products are daily produced, distributed and advertised which tempts people especially juveniles to purchase them purposelessly. A financially equipped person is aware of advertising traps and avoids bad financial habits. Change preposition
for children
Consequently
, they would not waste their families’ income for
useless stuff. Change preposition
on
In other words
, financial management
would help families to save money
more. For example
, posting different clothes and fantasy accessories would incentivize girls to spend a huge expense on them, but financial skills would help them to limit their dedicating
allowance to unimportant things and focus on saving.
In conclusion, schools, as an educational environment, Verb problem
apply
aims
to prepare pupils to enter into the real world. Financial Correct subject-verb agreement
aim
management
which is essentially influence
on the success of adults should be set in Correct article usage
an influence
school
curriculum to prepare students to overcome financial challenges.Correct article usage
the school
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Your essay provides a complete response to the task, but ensure that all ideas are well-developed and clearly elaborated. This will help elevate your score in the 'clear comprehensive ideas' criterion.
coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Your essay does an excellent job of addressing all parts of the task, presenting a clear position that is directly relevant to the question.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both strong and clearly frame your argument.
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