You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people think that it is a good thing for senior management positions to have much higher salaries than other workers in a company. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
A group of people believe that professional
workers
and managers
playing significant roles in the firm bear a right to earn more money plus incentives compared to ordinary laborers
. I subscribe to the notion that Change the spelling
labourers
managers
conduct the company
; besides
prosperity of the company
results in their strategy and decisions in sensitive situations. Therefore
they would deserve tangible bounces.
Initially
, it takes a long time which a manager nurture
and obtain sophisticated experience because steering a firm is complicated. Senior Fix the infinitive
to nurture
managers
should be aware of a quite number of aspects including the amount of revenue, demands of society, expenses of production and so forth which they should make strategies considered
those terms. if they were incapable of controlling the situation, the Wrong verb form
consider
company
might make a loss such
as ordinary workers
and
bosses and shareholders, Correct word choice
apply
hence
company
must provide some incentive for their lucrative managers
in order to encourage. Secondly
, senior managers
should routinely be available during the day since it is doable that unpredictable coincidences occur at any time , need
to appear to tackle the errors. Correct word choice
and need
Therefore
they are obsessed with their work when they are at the weekend.
on the other hand
, bosses have to consider rational salaries for their experts because if they pay a big fortune to them , it would be possible to create a profound gap between blue-collar workers
and managers
leading to unrest. Therefore
not only should companies dedicate incentives for veteran managers
, but also
they should allocate bonuses for manual workers
.
as outlined above, adept managers
are the backbone of firms which
prosperity and failure of Correct pronoun usage
whose
company
are consequences of their attempts and decisions Add an article
the company
a company
in
the course of time. Change preposition
over
Hence
companies should consider valuable income for decent managers
but they do not forget the simple workforce.Submitted by pooya.sheytoon2 on
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task achievement
The essay addresses the topic and provides a clear stance, but the argument needs to be more balanced with examples. Presenting specific instances would support your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining your logical structure by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly. The introduction and conclusion are present, but the body paragraphs can be better organized to enhance the flow of ideas.
task achievement
The introduction clearly states your position on the topic, providing a good starting point for your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay, reinforcing your stance.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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