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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #devices #people #age #group #television #canada #two #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram presents how many 18-to 25-year-olds used different devices to watch TV shows in 2009 and 2019. In overview, Flat-screen TVs were the most
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
 devices to
people
 in 2019.
By comparison
, at least one-third of
people
 watched videos through conventional TVs in 2009. It was incredible that the majority of
people
 watched shows
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 conventional television
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
34
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
people
 and it dramatically decreased to 4
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2019.
Conversely
, in 2019, the Use of flat screens became the main trend, which took up the highest
number
 among other devices with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
number
 of 27
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and it was at least three times the
number
 in 2009.
Besides
, in terms of the use of laptops and desktop computers, they both declined to the same
number
 of 12
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, which they were 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and 18
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 ten years ago.
Additionally
, Mobile phones and tablets were
also
 popular with youngsters, other than flat-screen TVs. The
number
 of tablets increased over three times more than before and cell phones climbed up as many as 26
percent
.
Submitted by hayashidajinja820 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, percent, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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