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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Task 1 : The chart below shows the changes in the percentage of households with cars in one European country between 1971 and 2001.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

Task 1 : The chart below shows the changes in the percentage of households with cars in one European country between 1971 and 2001.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#changes #percentage #households #cars #european #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The chart illustrates the
car
 changes in the percentage in one European country from 1971 to 2001. As can be seen, the households who did not have a
car
was decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 gradually, there was a dramatic increase in the proportion of cars
with
Change preposition
among
show examples
european's
Change noun form
european
show examples
people
.
However
,
people
Change preposition
for people
show examples
 who owned two cars, the
car
 rate fluctuated during the given period. The percentage of households with no
car
 was almost reached to 50% in 1971.
Then
, there was a significant drop in the middle of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
 with less than 45% and 30% exactly in 1981,
1991
Correct word choice
and 1991
show examples
 respectively. In the year 2001, the
people
Correct quantifier usage
number of people
show examples
 who did not drive declined to less than a third. Turning to the maximum rate of individuals with one
car
 at just over 45% in 1991 and just under 45% in 2001. In the years 1971 and 1981,
people
 with one
car
 had approximately a third.
Finally
, there number of
people
had
Correct pronoun usage
who had
show examples
 two cars
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
unstable
Add an article
an unstable
show examples
 percentage that fluctuated from 15% to less than 30% between 1971 to 2001.
Submitted by rajaa.albriki on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words car, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
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