Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Illegal downloading on the Internet is becoming more and more common. Some

people

Use synonyms

suggest that

this

Linking Words

is having an adverse impact on

music

Use synonyms

artists

Use synonyms

and on the

music

Use synonyms

industry

Use synonyms

. Others suggest that it

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

little impact or

influences

Fix the agreement mistake

influence

show examples

artists

Use synonyms

. Personally, I agree that

this

Linking Words

could cause losses in the

music

Use synonyms

industry

Use synonyms

.52

It is clear that

Linking Words

profit

Use synonyms

from the

on sale

Add a hyphen

on-sale

show examples

albums and digital albums on the

music

Use synonyms

platform

Use synonyms

is the largest part of

Correct article usage

the artist

show examples

artist

Change noun form

artist's

show examples

income.

These

Change the determiner

This profit

These profits

show examples

profit

Use synonyms

would

be divide

Change the verb form

be divided

show examples

into different

proportion

Fix the agreement mistake

proportions

show examples

and

give

Wrong verb form

given

show examples

to the entertainment company and the artist.

However

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

illegal Internet downloads could decrease the

profit

Use synonyms

especially the

profit

Use synonyms

from digital

album

Fix the agreement mistake

albums

show examples

because

people

Use synonyms

tend to use

music

Use synonyms

platforms currently, and they would tend to use the free way to listen to

music

Use synonyms

although

Linking Words

they know it is an illegal way.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, not only

artists

Use synonyms

would be affected by the illegal downloads but

also

Linking Words

the whole

music

Use synonyms

industry

Use synonyms

The large-scale

Correct article usage

Large-scale

show examples

illegal downloading could discourage

artists

Use synonyms

and they would not have enough passion to create

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

songs.

Additionally

Linking Words

, the legal

music

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

platform

plaatform

Correct your spelling

platform

would be affected because the

platform

Use synonyms

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to pay a huge amount of money for the

music

Use synonyms

artists

Use synonyms

to include songs, but the

platform

Use synonyms

could only earn money from the digital album and the membership fee.218 Another group of

people

Use synonyms

suggest that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

illegal

Use synonyms

download

Fix the agreement mistake

downloads

show examples

have little impact on both

artists

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

music

Correct article usage

the music

show examples

industry

Use synonyms

. They believe that

artists

Use synonyms

could earn a considerable

profit

Use synonyms

in a single concert, so the less

profit

Use synonyms

from the

music

Use synonyms

platform

Use synonyms

would not bring serious problems to the

artists

Use synonyms

Besides

Linking Words

, the illegal

download

Use synonyms

helps some new

artists

Use synonyms

to be more famous because the audience

are

Change the verb form

show examples

willing to listen to free but

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

music

Use synonyms

. It is a way for the

artists

Use synonyms

to increase popularity.

In addition

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

have strong stress from their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

and most of them only get a low-standard salary, the illegal

download

Use synonyms

offer

Correct subject-verb agreement

offers

show examples

people

Use synonyms

opportunities to enjoy

music

Use synonyms

without paying the membership fee to the

music

Use synonyms

platform

Use synonyms

. 336 In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

there are

variety

Add an article

a variety

show examples

of advantages the illegal

download

Use synonyms

bring

Change the verb form

brings

show examples

to the audience, there are many drawbacks to the

music

Use synonyms

industry

Use synonyms

Besides

Linking Words

, It would affect the process of the

music

Use synonyms

distribution.369

janejasparThu Sep 12 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Try to use more specific examples to support your points. For example, mention a specific artist or situation affected by illegal downloads.

task achievement

Work on reducing grammatical errors and improving sentence structure for clearer expression.

coherence cohesion

Ensure every paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence to guide the reader on what to expect.

coherence cohesion

Avoid repetition of ideas; make each point distinct to enhance clarity.

task achievement

You have covered both views of the argument, providing a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and serve their purposes well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

370 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

illegal downloads
financial losses
record labels
decrease in sales
perception
undermine
upcoming artists
pirated
exposure
concert attendance
merchandise sales
alternative revenue streams
live performances
sponsorships
streaming platforms
business models
loyal fan base
adapt
mitigate
thrive

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
With the advancement of technology,more and more people are able to work from home. This brings lots of benefits to workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Thanks to modernisation, more employees could work remotely from home. However I agree with the merits of home occupation in some conditions, I believe that it has its own drawbacks too.
6.5
band
Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language
The debate on the purpose of acquiring a new language often revolves around its utility for travel and work versus its broader benefits. While some individuals believe that learning a language is primarily for traveling and working in another country, others argue that the advantages extend far beyond these practical applications. I agree with the latter view, as the knowledge of another language also enhances opportunities in higher education and the business sector.
8.5
band
You are soon going to spend three months doing work experience in an organisation. Write a letter to the manager of the organisation where you are going to do work experience. In your letter • thank the manager for the opportunity to do work experience • explain what you hope to learn from the work experience • ask some questions about the work experience you are going to do
I am writing to you in regard to your organisation. I would like to thank you for this opportunity of working in your organisation for three months. I am felling so grateful for having this opportunity and I am ready to work very hard and learn as much as I can.
7
band
Some people believes that it is wrong to keep animals in zoo while other thinks that zoos are important for education and conservation .Discuss both the views and give your opinion
There are different views about keeping animal species in zoos. While there are many reasons that are beneficial to these creatures, I believe that they have the right to be free in their natural habitats.
8.5
band
In the future, all cars, buses, and trucks will be driverless. The only people traveling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
It is thought by certain groups that different kinds of vehicles will be replaced by driverless systems. Since various benefits have witnessed in this trend, I personally suggest that the advantages are outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

With the advancement of technology,more and more people are able to work from home. This brings lots of benefits to workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language

Some people believes that it is wrong to keep animals in zoo while other thinks that zoos are important for education and conservation .Discuss both the views and give your opinion

In the future, all cars, buses, and trucks will be driverless. The only people traveling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?