Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #internet #downloads #effect #music #industry #impact #artists

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Illegal downloading on the Internet is becoming more and more common. Some

people

Use synonyms

suggest that

this

Linking Words

is having an adverse impact on

music

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artists

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and on the

music

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industry

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. Others suggest that it

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

little impact or

influences

Fix the agreement mistake

influence

show examples

artists

Use synonyms

. Personally, I agree that

this

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could cause losses in the

music

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industry

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.52

It is clear that

Linking Words

profit

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from the

on sale

Add a hyphen

on-sale

show examples

albums and digital albums on the

music

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platform

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is the largest part of

Correct article usage

the artist

show examples

artist

Change noun form

artist's

show examples

income.

These

Change the determiner

This profit

These profits

show examples

profit

Use synonyms

would

be divide

Change the verb form

be divided

show examples

into different

proportion

Fix the agreement mistake

proportions

show examples

and

give

Wrong verb form

given

show examples

to the entertainment company and the artist.

However

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

illegal Internet downloads could decrease the

profit

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especially the

profit

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from digital

album

Fix the agreement mistake

albums

show examples

because

people

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tend to use

music

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platforms currently, and they would tend to use the free way to listen to

music

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although

Linking Words

they know it is an illegal way.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, not only

artists

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would be affected by the illegal downloads but

also

Linking Words

the whole

music

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industry

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The large-scale

Correct article usage

Large-scale

show examples

illegal downloading could discourage

artists

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and they would not have enough passion to create

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

songs.

Additionally

Linking Words

, the legal

music

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Correct your spelling

platform

plaatform

Correct your spelling

platform

would be affected because the

platform

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have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to pay a huge amount of money for the

music

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artists

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to include songs, but the

platform

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could only earn money from the digital album and the membership fee.218 Another group of

people

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suggest that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

illegal

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download

Fix the agreement mistake

downloads

show examples

have little impact on both

artists

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and

Use synonyms

music

Correct article usage

the music

show examples

industry

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. They believe that

artists

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could earn a considerable

profit

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in a single concert, so the less

profit

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from the

music

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platform

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would not bring serious problems to the

artists

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Besides

Linking Words

, the illegal

download

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helps some new

artists

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to be more famous because the audience

are

Change the verb form

show examples

willing to listen to free but

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

music

Use synonyms

. It is a way for the

artists

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to increase popularity.

In addition

Linking Words

people

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have strong stress from their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

and most of them only get a low-standard salary, the illegal

download

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offer

Correct subject-verb agreement

offers

show examples

people

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opportunities to enjoy

music

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without paying the membership fee to the

music

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platform

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. 336 In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

there are

variety

Add an article

a variety

show examples

of advantages the illegal

download

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bring

Change the verb form

brings

show examples

to the audience, there are many drawbacks to the

music

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industry

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Besides

Linking Words

, It would affect the process of the

music

Use synonyms

distribution.369

Submitted by janejaspar on Thu Sep 12 2024

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task achievement

Try to use more specific examples to support your points. For example, mention a specific artist or situation affected by illegal downloads.

task achievement

Work on reducing grammatical errors and improving sentence structure for clearer expression.

coherence cohesion

Ensure every paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence to guide the reader on what to expect.

coherence cohesion

Avoid repetition of ideas; make each point distinct to enhance clarity.

task achievement

You have covered both views of the argument, providing a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and serve their purposes well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

370 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

illegal downloads
financial losses
record labels
decrease in sales
perception
undermine
upcoming artists
pirated
exposure
concert attendance
merchandise sales
alternative revenue streams
live performances
sponsorships
streaming platforms
business models
loyal fan base
adapt
mitigate
thrive

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Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

some people think that using mobile phones and computers has a negative effect o young people's reading and writing skills . to what extent do you agree or disagree

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their doctors . Do you this this is a positive or negative development ?

1. You are leaving your current job for some reasons and you would like to recommend one of your friends to your manager. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter - say why you resign - what are the duties of your current job - why your friend is suitable for this job

Many different countries have most shops and products as the same. Some think that it is a positive development, whereas others consider it as negative. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

An increasing number of children are overweight which could result many problems when they grow older both in terms of their health and heath care costs. Why do you think so many children are overweight? What could be done to solve this problem?