Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Illegal downloading on the Internet is becoming more and more common. Some
people
suggest that this
is having an adverse impact on music
artists
and on the music
industry
. Others suggest that it have
little impact or Correct subject-verb agreement
has
influences
on Fix the agreement mistake
influence
artists
. Personally, I agree that this
could cause losses in the music
industry
.52
It is clear that
profit
from the on sale
albums and digital albums on the Add a hyphen
on-sale
music
platform
is the largest part of Correct article usage
the artist
artist
income. Change noun form
artist's
These
Change the determiner
This profit
These profits
profit
would be divide
into different Change the verb form
be divided
proportion
and Fix the agreement mistake
proportions
give
to the entertainment company and the artist. Wrong verb form
given
However
, the
illegal Internet downloads could decrease the Correct article usage
apply
profit
especially the profit
from digital album
because Fix the agreement mistake
albums
people
tend to use music
platforms currently, and they would tend to use the free way to listen to music
although
they know it is an illegal way. Furthermore
, not only artists
would be affected by the illegal downloads but also
the whole music
industry
. The large-scale
illegal downloading could discourage Correct article usage
Large-scale
artists
and they would not have enough passion to create high quality
songs. Add a hyphen
high-quality
Additionally
, the legal music
Correct your spelling
platform
plaatform
would be affected because the Correct your spelling
platform
platform
have
to pay a huge amount of money for the Change the verb form
has
music
copyright fee to the artists
to include songs, but the platform
could only earn money from the digital album and the membership fee.218
Another group of people
suggest that the
illegal Correct article usage
apply
download
have little impact on both Fix the agreement mistake
downloads
artists
and music
Correct article usage
the music
industry
. They believe that artists
could earn a considerable profit
in a single concert, so the less profit
from the music
platform
would not bring serious problems to the artists
. Besides
, the illegal download
helps some new artists
to be more famous because the audience are
willing to listen to free but Change the verb form
is
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
music
. It is a way for the artists
to increase popularity. In addition
, people
have strong stress from their career
and most of them only get a low-standard salary, the illegal Fix the agreement mistake
careers
download
offer
Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
people
opportunities to enjoy music
without paying the membership fee to the music
platform
. 336
In conclusion, while
there are variety
of advantages the illegal Add an article
a variety
download
bring
to the audience, there are many drawbacks to the Change the verb form
brings
music
industry
. Besides
, It would affect the process of the music
distribution.369Submitted by janejaspar on
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task achievement
Try to use more specific examples to support your points. For example, mention a specific artist or situation affected by illegal downloads.
task achievement
Work on reducing grammatical errors and improving sentence structure for clearer expression.
coherence cohesion
Ensure every paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence to guide the reader on what to expect.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of ideas; make each point distinct to enhance clarity.
task achievement
You have covered both views of the argument, providing a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and serve their purposes well.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.