It is a doctor's responsibility to inform patients if they have a serious disease. Doctors should not be allowed to withhold medical information from their patients. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The primary consideration for
doctors
is the interests and care of their patients
. The more
accountability toward Correct article usage
More
patients
must not banning
the serious illness and Change the verb form
ban
be banning
the
good idea Correct article usage
a
of
the doctor to discuss the serious illness to Change preposition
for
found
immediate Wrong verb form
find
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
for
Change preposition
to
this
problem.from
my perspective I totally agree with Capitalize word
From
this
statement and in this
essay
I will discuss my point Add a comma
essay,
view
.
First of all . Even though a straightforward Change preposition
of view
the
ban is a great idea to keep people especially patient Correct article usage
apply
completed
their lives without stress and overthinking about the disease . Wrong verb form
completing
For example
,most of the patients
when they realised about
their health and his live on the edge Change preposition
apply
they
died from Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
overthinking Correct article usage
apply
while
1 percentage
of people Replace the word
per cent
who
can Correct pronoun usage
apply
adopt
and live as Correct your spelling
adapt
a
normal Correct article usage
apply
person
. Fix the agreement mistake
people
Therefore
, doctors
should deal with patients
carefully and just motivate them to keep
healthy and focus Verb problem
stay
in
their health.
Change preposition
on
Secondly
, there are many ways to help patients
to pass
Verb problem
overcome
this
problem. For instance
, doctors
should have teaching methods how
to control and convince Change preposition
on how
patients
to keep health
and Replace the word
healthy
safety
by Replace the word
safe
give
them lists to follow healthy diet and exercise. Change the verb form
giving
Physicians
frequently ignore their patients
' wishes when they consider the appropriateness of truth telling
. A complete shift from nondisclosure to mandatory disclosure without considering Add a hyphen
truth-telling
patients
' preferences may lead to serious harm to patients
who do not want to be told the truth. Because physicians
cannot satisfactorily treat patients
without knowing their preferences toward disclosure of a diagnosis, I propose a simple strategy to break this
long-standing ethical dilemma physicians
must develop the habit of inquiring about their patients
' preferences.
In conclusion, doctors
care and
Change preposition
for and
treatment
the Replace the word
treat
patients
and his
primary to do the best possible treatment Correct pronoun usage
apply
to
them. Despite Change preposition
for
this
evidence of their patients
' wishes, physicians
in many countries still hesitate to disclose this
and other diagnoses.Submitted by a.almakmari93 on
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task achievement
Work on providing clear and specific examples to support your points. The examples provided are a bit vague and general.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of the essay. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas flow logically between paragraphs.
task achievement
Proofread for grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. This can enhance readability and clarity.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph is well-developed and contributes to the overall argument. Some paragraphs could be more focused and detailed.
coherence cohesion
You have provided an introduction and a conclusion, which helps frame the essay effectively.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address multiple aspects of the issue, which shows an effort to provide a comprehensive discussion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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