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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013

The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013
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The graph illustrates continually
people
Use synonyms
 ate in junk
food
Use synonyms
restaurants
Use synonyms
 in the duration between 2003 and 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen by the form that there was a clear vibration in the figures, the numbers were not steady.
According to
Linking Words
 what is depicted, in 2003, more than 30% of
people
Use synonyms
eat
Wrong verb form
ate
show examples
 from
restaurants
Use synonyms
 once a week, and that was the peak in 2003.
While
Linking Words
 about 3% eat unhealthy
food
Use synonyms
 daily. On the other side, the proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 who eat from fast
food
Use synonyms
restaurants
Use synonyms
 one time a week increased to nearly 33% in 2006.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 2003 the rate was 5% of
people
Use synonyms
 did not eat unhealthy
food
Use synonyms
. In 2006, 25% of individuals preferred to eat fast
food
Use synonyms
 once or twice a month.
In addition
Linking Words
, less than 5% were vegetarian, and that percentage equaled to 2013.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the same period, most
people
Use synonyms
 had been
gone
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 once or twice a month.
Finally
Linking Words
, above than 15% of
people
Use synonyms
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 been going to
restaurants
Use synonyms
 several times a week.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, food, restaurants with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fast food consumption
  • Frequency
  • Dining trends
  • Demographic factors
  • Peak periods
  • Downward/upward trend
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Economic impact
  • Health implications
  • Convenience foods
  • Eating habits
  • Statistical evidence
  • Year-over-year comparison
  • Fluctuation
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