It is generally believed that some people are born with certains talents, for instance for sport or music, and other are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.

A public
Correct article usage
Public
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opinion among individuals
say
Correct subject-verb agreement
says
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that some are born with a specific
talent
towards something
Add the comma(s)
, for example,
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for example
a person born with great skill in football or some good at chees more than others,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
it is not necessary to be born with
talent
because there is a claimed says the chilled can be good in anything when we taught them,
although
the first opinion is correct
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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I believe that second opinion
also
true because there is a certain way of learning which lead to the
succss
Correct your spelling
success
in
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
.
Firstly
, it is true that many people are born with
talent
in some area, and they become really good quickly and they provide a significantly high level of performance ,
for
instance
Add the comma(s)
instance,
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the great musician
Mazart
Correct your spelling
Mozart
when I heard the story of his success I noticed that he did it in a really short time and that shows the impact of
talent
. In fact,
this
is not the only path to being good at something, if someone decides to learn a skill and with a sincere desire he will eventually become even better compared to someone who has the
talent
,
for example
, a lot of scientists were not geniuses
although
they presented great things for science and humans، and there is a study Harvard did shows that 80 per cent of successful people reach to their success by the hard work. In conclusion,
although
it is true that
talent
is important for quick achievement but does not mean that it will be the only way.
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task by discussing both views and giving your opinion. However, ensure that your position is clearly stated in the introduction and conclusion. This helps in fully satisfying the 'Task Achievement' criterion.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is organized and paragraphs are present, try to ensure a logical flow between ideas. Use linking words and transition phrases to create a clearer progression of thoughts, such as 'Firstly,' 'In addition,' or 'Therefore.'
task achievement
Your main points are present but general. To improve, support your claims with more detailed examples and explanations. For instance, explain more about Mozar's (Mozart's) achievements or provide additional real-life examples of talent vs. hard work.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea. This helps in improving coherence and making your essay easier to follow.
task achievement
You have used a relevant example (Mozart) to support one of your points.
task achievement
Your essay presents both sides of the argument and expresses your own opinion, which is essential for this task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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