All large companies should provide sports and community facilities to the local community. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement include some examples.

In
this
modern era, a significant portion of companies provide a wide range of facilities to their
employees
. Since humans are sociable creatures, most of us do seek human connection with whom we can correlate.
According to
the data, in
such
vast organizations,
employees
find it very hard to maintain their work-life
balance
goals.
However
, companies host
sports
competitions
, and events, and form communities to help their
employees
to maintain work-life
balance
. Through most of the community and groups,
employees
can connect with like-minded people.
Furthermore
,
sports
competitions
keep humans fit and healthy if done every day. For work-life
balance
, the best alternative is
sports
.
Moreover
, people have their own passion in their life. People join these types of communities to keep their passion alive for longer periods of duration.
For example
, companies
such
as HCL, Delloite, and McKinsey host
competitions
once a year for their
employees
. These kinds of
competitions
help
employees
to
balance
their personal and professional
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Through various communities, facility
employees
communicate with each other in various ways. In conclusion, organizing a local tournament or a
sports
tournament is more exciting, fun, and fulfilling. Most of these help them to connect, create, and foster a better future with other
employees
.
Submitted by debasistripathy.india on

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introduction conclusion present
The introduction briefly touches on the topic but does not clearly state the writer's position regarding the extent of agreement or disagreement with the statement. Make sure to clearly state your stance in your introduction.
logical structure
The essay needs a more logical structure. There is an attempt to present ideas coherently, but the flow can be improved. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
supported main points
While some main points are made, they are not always well-supported. More examples or explanations are needed to strengthen the argument.
complete response
Addressing the prompt requires a more specific response to whether large companies should provide sports and community facilities to the local community, not just their employees. Clarify this throughout your essay.
relevant specific examples
The essay includes relevant examples of companies like HCL, Deloitte, and McKinsey hosting competitions for their employees.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion provides a summary and positive note on the benefits of organizing tournaments and community activities.

Your opinion

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