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Band 3.5

The plans show the layout of the university’s sports center now, and how it will look after redevelopment.

#plans #show #layout #university’s #sports #center #redevelopment
The two maps illustrate the university’s
sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 before and after the reconstruction.
Overall
, as is obvious, there will be some transformations like adding a leisure pool, and
sports
 hall and
also
 devoting more changing rooms and in the meantime, equipping Cafe, Dance studio, and
sports
 shop. Presently, on both wings of the university’s
sports
center
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centre
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, 2 outdoor courts are located.
In addition
, the gym club is on the North
side
, and the changing room and Seating are on the West and East
side
 of the pool. In front of the corridor, there is a reception. For the prospective plan, it has been objected that the university will add a cafe shop and
sports
 store at the entrance of the
center
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centre
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. A wide relaxation pool, which is going to be beside the changing room, will be on the West
side
, and in front of it, 2 extra outfit changing spaces will be built, where one of them will be on the right hand of the Roastery.
Subsequently
, two Dance studios will be constructed beside the
Sports
 hall, going to be built
instead
 of an outdoor court, on the East
side
 of the
center
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centre
show examples
.
Submitted by neginsepahvand on

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introduction conclusion
Include a more distinct conclusion to summarize the main points of transformation. This will give a sense of completion to your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify some sentences for better understanding. For example, 'In the prospective plan, it has been objected' should be rewritten for clarity.
relevant specific examples
Make sure that all relevant features are covered. Mention the demolition of the outdoor courts and the exact location of the new facilities.
complete response
Good attempt at comparing the current and future layouts of the sports center.
logical structure
Logical progression of ideas, separating present and future layouts effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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