Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

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Government funding is the most crucial decision for any
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
or municipal authority. Investing either in public or commercial sectors
such
Linking Words
as
arts
Use synonyms
,music and
theatre
Use synonyms
or many more is the hardest decision for the government authorities as some
people
Use synonyms
will think that it
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
a waste of money to invest in music,
arts
Use synonyms
and
theatre
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. It is best to invest in public
services
Use synonyms
rather than commercial activities. My views are in the middle of
this
Linking Words
statement as I highly believe that
to invest
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investing
show examples
in public
services
Use synonyms
is important but
to invest
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investing
show examples
in commercial things
as
Add a missing verb
is as
show examples
important as public
services
Use synonyms
. To invest in public
services
Use synonyms
is very
imoprtant
Correct your spelling
important
for the
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
because it helps the local
people
Use synonyms
to get easy
excess
Correct your spelling
access
show examples
to some of certain things. Funding
in
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for
show examples
government
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
, national highways, bridges and many more
are
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is
show examples
very important for any
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city
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city's
show examples
development and for the local
people
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.
For
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example
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example,
show examples
if the locals will have an easy
excess
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access
show examples
to the hospital with the best facility they wouldn't have to go to other metro
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city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
or states for the treatment. So, I highly believe to fund in public
services
Use synonyms
is
important
Correct article usage
an important
show examples
aspects
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aspect
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
any
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
.
Secondly
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,
to invest
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investing
show examples
in commercial activities
such
Linking Words
as
arts
Use synonyms
, crafts and
theatre
Use synonyms
is as important as public
services
Use synonyms
. Why is it necessary is because
arts
Use synonyms
and crafts have always been
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
imoptant
Correct your spelling
important
part of developing any cities since our ancient era as our kings and queens were
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
to
gave
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
importance to it. It is something
people
Use synonyms
can focus on outside of their busy lifestyle and can
also
Linking Words
work as therapy for many
people
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.
For example
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, London has always been
a
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the
show examples
best
city
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to set an
examples
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example
show examples
for
people
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not only
showing
Change preposition
by showing
show examples
their
Use synonyms
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
their acting skills in
theatre
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it brings a lot of benefits to
Use synonyms
city
Add an article
the city
a city
show examples
, first is tourism which will bring income for the
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
and second is work opportunities for locals which will directly generate income for them. In conclusion, it is clearly stated
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why it is
imoptant
Correct your spelling
important
to invest in public
as well as
Linking Words
in
arts
Use synonyms
, music and
theatre
Use synonyms
. Public
services
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and commercial
services
Use synonyms
both are very important. In
above
Add an article
the above
an above
show examples
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I have input my ideas
that
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on
show examples
why my point is in the middle and how both of them have
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
owns
Wrong verb form
own
show examples
positive impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
the locals.
Submitted by pearlshah2912 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear structure with distinct paragraphs. Separate the introduction, each main point, and the conclusion to improve readability.
task achievement
Work on improving your grammar and spelling, as there are several mistakes that affect the clarity of your arguments. Pay attention to word choice and sentence structure for better coherence.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view, acknowledging the importance of both public services and the arts, which shows a fair and thoughtful approach to the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points, reinforcing the balanced stance you took in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural enrichment
  • expression of creativity
  • promote diversity
  • enhance social cohesion
  • boost tourism
  • job creation
  • stimulate economic growth
  • improve quality of life
  • essential services
  • maintenance and development
What to do next:
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