Some people believe that there should be death penalty for those who committed violent crimes. Others say that this solution is unacceptable in modern society. Describe advantages and disadvantages of death penalty and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A number of people are convinced that executions should be legalised for those violent criminals. Meanwhile, some think that
this
Linking Words
kind of punishment is inadmissible in our society.
Advantage
Correct article usage
The advantage
show examples
of lethal punishment is that it gives justice for victims and their families
while
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
being immoral and inhumane for its violence
as well as
Linking Words
having a chance of killing an innocent person for nothing.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss both
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
and disadvantages of
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
penalty.
Initially
Linking Words
, capital punishment became illegal because of its brutality and the risk of wrongful conviction. Even with
modernised
Correct article usage
a modernised
show examples
law system today, there is still a chance of taking
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
life of a guiltless person in
such
Linking Words
a brutal way making execution a controversial decision.
For example
Linking Words
, Carlos DeLuna was executed in Texas in 1989, evidence later suggested that he was innocent.
This
Linking Words
case proves that some individuals get punished in
such
Linking Words
a bizarre way not fairly.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, judicial killing may seem justified in certain cases
such
Linking Words
as mass murder or terrorism.
Death
Add an article
The death
show examples
penalty gives
sense
Add an article
a sense
show examples
of relief to those who went through
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
loss of a loved one, knowing that the perpetrator won’t hurt anyone again.
For instance
Linking Words
, Saddam Hussein who was hanged in 2006 was convicted of crimes against humanity for the killing of 148 Shiite villagers . In conclusion,
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
sentence has its own advantages and drawbacks. I could be well deserved,
however
Linking Words
, there
also
Linking Words
could be exceptional circumstances. All
this
Linking Words
considered,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think that
ultimate
Correct article usage
the ultimate
show examples
penalty is too savage for our cultivated society and we should take more humane ideas
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
consideration.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay provides a clear discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of the death penalty and includes relevant examples to support your points. To improve, ensure that your introduction explicitly states your opinion to set the direction of the essay clearly.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is cohesive and logically structured, some sentences could flow better with the use of transitional phrases. This would enhance readability and improve the overall coherence. For example, using phrases like 'Furthermore,' or 'However,' could link ideas more smoothly.
grammar
There are occasional grammatical errors and minor awkward phrasings. For instance, 'Capital punishment became illegal' should be 'Capital punishment is viewed by some as inhumane.' Polishing these would make your essay more refined and professional.
task achievement
You have presented a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the death penalty, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your use of relevant and specific examples, such as the case of Carlos DeLuna and Saddam Hussein, effectively supports your arguments and makes your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a well-defined introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This logical flow helps the reader follow your arguments easily.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: