Today, more and more full-time university students focus on other activities rather than spend a lot of time studying. Some people think it is essential for university students to be involved in other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#university #students #focus #activities #time #people

Nowadays is more

comun

Correct your spelling

common

that

Correct word choice

for

show examples

full-

time

university

students

spend

Fix the infinitive

to spend

show examples

their

time

in academic and

university

activies inster

Correct your spelling

activities instead

invest

Wrong verb form

investing

show examples

their

time

studying.

The

Correct article usage

University

show examples

university

students

spend most of their

time

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

campus whether studying or doing social

activities

, it is important that the

students

be involve

Change the verb form

be involved

show examples

extra currucular

Correct your spelling

extracurricular

activities

in order to

encorage

Correct your spelling

encourage

then

Correct your spelling

them

show examples

to improve their

score

Fix the agreement mistake

scores

show examples

or give them some tools to manage anxiety or stress during their courses.

this

essay will discuss the importance and the

impact

of doing and

extra curricular

Correct your spelling

extracurricular

show examples

activities

in the

students

Change noun form

student's

students'

show examples

lifes

Correct your spelling

lives

show examples

. The anxiety and stress that individual can have during their studies is a huge concern. the correct balance between study and other

activities

is essential to

imporve

Correct your spelling

improve

not

olny

Correct your spelling

only

their health but

also

help them to

imporve

Correct your spelling

improve

their scores.

Therefore

Univesities

Correct your spelling

Universities

must offer a

big

Correct word choice

wide

show examples

range of extra

activities

in their semesters in order to prevent illness and mental

helth

Correct your spelling

health

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

their

students

. some

activities

such

as sports,

art

Correct word choice

and art

show examples

workshops

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

, could help them to manage in a better way with their problems and

specialy

Correct your spelling

especially

in the exams

time

when the

students

can suffer a huge

presuare

Correct your spelling

pressure

pleasure

. the majority of the universities have been creating new spaces where the

students

can relax and express themselves.

On the other hand

, some people believe that

this

Change the determiner

this activity

these activities

show examples

activities

could distract them

Change preposition

from

show examples

their studies.

however

depent

Correct your spelling

depending

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct word choice

whether the

show examples

studient achive

Correct your spelling

student achieves

a good score and

try

Correct subject-verb agreement

tries

show examples

to improve

Change preposition

for a

show examples

long

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time

. there is no doubt that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good

students

usually

practice

Correct your spelling

practise

show examples

sports or play

intruments

Correct your spelling

instruments

. but spend more

time

that the

neccesary

Correct your spelling

necessary

could

be have

Change the verb form

have

show examples

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

impact

in their

performace

Correct your spelling

performance

.The correct balance between both of them is imperative. In conclusion, even if doing other

activities

during

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

University

has a good

impact

in a big range of

differentes

Correct your spelling

different

ways in the

studients journy

Correct your spelling

student journey

, it is important that each student make sure that the amount of

time

that they need to invest in their free

time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because

at the end

of the

days

Add a comma

days,

show examples

an incorrect way to plan

this

Change the determiner

this activity

these activities

show examples

activities

can have a negative

impact

rather than a good one.

Submitted by camilaaranzazur on Wed Sep 18 2024

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coherence cohesion

Focus on organizing ideas more clearly to enhance logical structure and coherence. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by relevant examples.

general

Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to improve clarity and coherence. Avoid run-on sentences and ensure that each sentence conveys a complete thought.

task achievement

Expand on your points with specific examples or studies to support your arguments. This will help in providing a complete response and make your essay more convincing.

task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt and discusses the importance of extracurricular activities for university students, which is relevant to the task.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion and provide closure.

task achievement

The essay mentions the benefits of managing stress and anxiety through extracurricular activities, which is a viable point.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
51Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

350 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today, more and more full-time university students focus on other activities rather than spend a lot of time studying. Some people think it is essential for university students to be involved in other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Government should spend more money on medical research and less on researching the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health, others believe that government should make sure that their are healthy.Discuss both views and give your opinion.