Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small. local business are unable to compete. some people think that the closure of local business will bring death of the local communities. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#development #expansion #supermarkets #countries #business #people #closure #death #communities

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There is no denying the fact that local

businesses

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are becoming more popular nowadays.

While

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it is commonly believed that the closure of startups and small

businesses

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will break down local communities, some argue against

this

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view. In

this

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essay, I will

further

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elaborate on my view about local business competition.

To begin

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with, traditionally, any business needs time to start generating profit. Small

businesses

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in particular

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, require time and often lack the capital to sustain themselves, especially when competing with international companies in the same domain.

For example

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, a small supermarket located near a mega supermarket like Carrefour cannot continue because the mega supermarket can sell at lower prices

due to

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bulk purchasing, which allows them to receive larger discounts than small

businesses

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. Another point to consider is the contemporary trend of online shopping, which increases competition and is a significant factor in the closure of small

businesses

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Additionally

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, most employees in small

businesses

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are from the local area, and their closure reduces the money flow within those communities. These factors contribute to increasing unemployment and

potentially

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potential

show examples

crime.

According to

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a report released in 2022 by the Pew Research Center, 75% of crime is attributed to unemployment. In conclusion, many small companies are unable to compete. I firmly believe that the government should support

this

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type of small business to sustain local communities.

Submitted by rami_agha77 on Wed Sep 18 2024

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task response

Try to elaborate a bit more on each main point to provide a more comprehensive discussion. For example, add more specific examples or statistics to support your points about unemployment and community impact.

task response

Ensure a balanced discussion by addressing potential counterarguments. For example, you could discuss possible benefits of supermarkets and how local businesses might adapt.

coherence

You can improve coherence by using more transitional phrases to connect ideas, such as 'Furthermore,' 'On the other hand,' or 'In addition.'

coherence

The structure of the essay is solid, but consider elaborating more in the conclusion about possible solutions to support local businesses.

coherence

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your arguments and bring them to a close effectively.

coherence

You provide a logical structure that is easy to follow, with distinct paragraphs for each main point.

task achievement

The examples and points discussed are relevant and support your thesis well.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

224 words

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Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small. local business are unable to compete. some people think that the closure of local business will bring death of the local communities. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

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Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the word. what are the causes of it? and what solution do you offer?

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?