IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. It is important for all towns and cities to have large public outdoor places like squares and parks. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #towns #cities #places #squares #parks
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It is crucial for towns and cities to construct large public outdoor
spaces
such
 as parks and squares for all citizens. I strongly agree with
this
 statement
due to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 several reasons.
Firstly
, we can all agree that public
spaces
 help to build community connections and social interactions among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people. Not only that, parks and squares
also
 provide spots for various activities, from exercising to picnicking.
This
 way families and friends can enjoy their day out in the sunny weather and not stay cooped up in their own houses.
Additionally
, with the increase of these places, more trees will be planted which will contribute positively to improving our environment. These installments
also
uses
Change the verb form
use
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 government funds from taxes that we pay, so with
this
, we can
also
 enjoy our contribution. Some individuals might argue that investing in public
spaces
 wastes
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
government funds, especially if these areas are prone to acts of vandalism. They often prioritize
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
housing and commercial developments
instead
.
However
,
this
 opinion fails to assess the amount of benefits that these infrastructures bring in. So,
instead
 of seeing parks and squares as wasting funds, they should be seen as investments in community development. We can protect these places from vandalism and destruction
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
 better maintenance from every resident. With local residents taking care of these
spaces
, towns can flourish, grow, and reduce
damage
Add an article
the damage
show examples
 done by wreckless individuals In conclusion, I firmly believe that every city should have public outdoor areas, as these
spaces
 not only
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 better for the community but
also
 can aid in forming a healthier environment for all residents.
Submitted by novendyevan122 on

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task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your main points. For instance, you could mention specific activities or events that often take place in parks and squares.
coherence cohesion
Improve transitions between paragraphs for better flow. Use linking words or phrases to show the relationship between ideas more clearly.
task achievement
Better address the counterarguments where possible. Expand on the opposing views briefly before refuting them to show consideration of all perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to add variety and interest to your writing.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states your opinion, which sets up your essay well.
logical structure
You have a logical structure in your essay, with clear main points presented in each paragraph.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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