Nowadays many people prefer to shop in supermarkets rather than small shops or local markets? Is this positive or negative for development? Discuss and give your opinion.

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A
lot
of local
markets
are closing down these days because their business is dying down
due to
plenty of
supermarkets
opening up, Nowadays a
lot
of people are leaning towards shopping in
supermarkets
rather
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
local
markets
, In
this
essay I will discuss my opinion on why shopping in
supermarkets
can prove to be better
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
shopping in local
markets
, and, some downsides that local
markets
can face. Shopping in
supermarkets
can offer you a
varaity
Correct your spelling
variety
of things,
for
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
you can find a
lot
of
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
types of fruits, vegetables, and a
varaity
Correct your spelling
variety
of
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
products from all around the world. Another reason people prefer
supermarkets
is
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
they tend to be much closer to where they live,
this
will make them not waste time driving just to reach a supermarket,
clearly
Add a comma
clearly,
show examples
supermarkets
are much superior
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
local
markets
But
on the other hand
, the sheer amount of
supermarkets
is
effecting
Correct your spelling
affecting
show examples
the local
markets
negatively, Because
supermarkets
are taking a
lot
of business from local
markets
and
this
may lead to a
lot
of local
markets
closing down,
also
local
markets
rely on selling
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
stock
this
is especially true in local food
markets
.
clearly
Add a comma
clearly,
show examples
local
markets
are being
effected
Correct your spelling
affected
show examples
negatively by the rise of
supermarkets
. In
this
essay I
disscussed
Correct your spelling
discussed
discuss
the positives and negatives of shopping in
supermarkets
rather than local
markets
, In my personal opinion I would prefer to shop in
supermarkets
as they are the easiest to reach and
im
Correct your spelling
is
I'm
much more
likley
Correct your spelling
likely
to find what
im
Correct your spelling
I'm
looking for.
Submitted by almansouradel1 on

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task achievement
Ensure that you address all parts of the question. While the essay discusses both sides, it would benefit from a more balanced exploration and clear stance.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the logical structure of your essay. Use clearer paragraphing and logical connectors to ensure a smooth flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Expand on your introduction and conclusion. These sections should frame your essay clearly, providing a strong opening and closing argument.
task achievement
The essay shows a good grasp of the topic and presents a clear preference, which is necessary for task accomplishment.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear attempt at discussing both advantages and disadvantages, showing an understanding of the need to present a balanced view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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