Some people think it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #boys #girls #schools #benefit

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There is an ongoing debate about whether

boys

and

girls

should be separated in different

schools

. Some

people

believe children will get more advantages from mixed

schools

while

others argue that

separate

Replace the word

separating

show examples

students

Change preposition

show examples

gender

is a wiser decision.

This

essay agrees that

boys

Change noun form

boys'

boy's

show examples

and

girls

Change noun form

girls'

girl's

show examples

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

will have more advantages. Children

attend

Correct pronoun usage

who attend

show examples

mixed

schools

will get more advantages than

Correct pronoun usage

those in

show examples

separate

schools

. The former provides more opportunities for young

people

to know the other

gender

. Our

socity

Correct your spelling

society

is constructed by both genders. Everyone needs to know how to stay with others, no matter who is male or female. They will go to work after

graduate

Replace the word

graduation

show examples

The society

Correct article usage

Society

show examples

will not separate males and females

Change preposition

apply

show examples

anywhere.

For instance

in addition

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

special places,

such

army

Add an article

the army

show examples

, the most regular

vancancies

Correct your spelling

vacancies

have no demand

about

Change preposition

for

show examples

gender

, which means men and women need to work together.

However

, some

people

think that we should separate

boys

and

girls

in different

schools

, because

this

is an

effecient

Correct your spelling

efficient

way to prevent children

to fall

Change preposition

from falling

show examples

in love

Change preposition

show examples

too young

age

Correct article usage

an age

show examples

. In fact,

such

method

Correct article usage

a method

show examples

cannot stop loving issues

happend

Correct your spelling

happening

schools

, between

boys

or between

girls

. The

developement

Correct your spelling

development

education

Correct article usage

the education

show examples

system allows

people

to spend more and more years to be educated. Teenagers being in love is a normal rather than shameful thing and we should use a more inclusive view to face

such

phenomenon. In conclusion, students will obtain more benefits

to study

Change preposition

from studying

show examples

in mixed

schools

Although

separate

schools

could stop teenagers

to fall

Change preposition

from falling

show examples

in love,

this

is not

Change the article

show examples

inclusive view,

whereas

Correct article usage

a mixed

show examples

mixed

Add a hyphen

mixed-gender

show examples

gender

environment could help young

people

better know how to cooperate with the other

gender

in their future workplaces.

Submitted by 2587729786 on Thu Sep 19 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed. Your stance should be clearly indicated from the beginning.

coherence cohesion

Make sure that each paragraph logically flows from one to the next, and that the ideas within paragraphs are clearly and coherently connected.

task achievement

Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your main points. This would make your argument stronger and more convincing.

overall quality

Check for grammatical errors, and use a variety of sentence structures to make your writing more engaging.

overall quality

You have a clear introduction and conclusion which are relevant to the discussion and summarize your stance well.

task achievement

You have presented both views and provided your opinion, which addresses the task requirement effectively.

coherence cohesion

Your essay contains logical points and attempts to explain why mixed schools are beneficial and why separate schools might be favored by some.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

co-education
gender segregation
peer pressure
academic performance
gender stereotypes
discrimination
social skills
teamwork
collaboration
diversity

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Some people think it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Your opinion

People say that music is a good way of bringing people of different ages and cultures together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Children should never be educated at home by their parents. Discuss.

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?