IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Write about the following topic: 'Nowadays, news companies spend a lot of money covering international news. However, local news is more relevant to people's lives and should receive more funding.' To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #news #companies #money #people #lives
Currently, print media invests more money for
publsihing
Correct your spelling
publishing
 global
news
.
But
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, it is argued that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
domestic
news
deserve
Change the verb form
deserves
show examples
 more coverage and funding.
This
 essay agrees with
this
 statement as it is the only source of
news
 and it improves the relationship between
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and
its'
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
 citizens.
Firstly
, In most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries,
newspaers
Correct your spelling
newspapers
 are the
soley
Correct your spelling
sole
solely
 source of
news
.
Therefore
, they should prioritize informing
people
 about what is happening in the
country
 rather
informing
Correct word choice
than informing
show examples
 about what is going on
ountside
Correct your spelling
outside
 of the
country
. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 local incidents affect their lives significantly. Not knowing about their own issues
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 them aliens of the
country
.
For example
, some
people
 get to know about the tourist destinations of their own
country
 only after seeing a video uploaded by a tourist.
Secondly
,
newspaper
Add an article
the newspaper
a newspaper
show examples
 is a main medium of communication between the
people
 and their
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
. It is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 responsibility of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
print media to make aware
people
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
governemnt's
Correct your spelling
government's
 investments, job opportunities, services, and any public announcements.
For example
, in some countries, the
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
 gazettes are only released in newspapers.
In addition
, it should publish the issues faced by the
people
 in the
country
 to force the
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
 to take action against them as print media work closely with local
people
 through local reporters. In conclusion, newspapers should invest more money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 covering local
news
 as they have a duty to educate the public about the local
news
 and to maintain a harmonious relationship between the
governemnt
Correct your spelling
government
 and
its'
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
 citizens.
Submitted by gowsht on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Ensure that spelling and grammatical errors are minimized. For example, 'publsihing' should be 'publishing', 'deserve' should be 'deserves', and 'governemnt' should be 'government'. Minor errors can disrupt the reader's flow and understanding.
content
Expand on your examples and provide more specific details. While the ideas are clear, supporting them with more specific and relevant examples would strengthen your arguments. For instance, mentioning specific local issues or services covered by newspapers could add depth.
cohesion
Provide a clearer transition between paragraphs, especially when shifting from one main point to another. This enhances readability and makes your argument more cohesive.
introduction
Your introduction is strong and clearly states your position on the topic. It effectively outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay and reinforces your stance on the issue.
structure
You have logically structured the paragraphs, ensuring that each paragraph discusses a separate point. This organization helps in presenting a coherent argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!